Some people think that the increasing use of computer and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on the young people reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Some people believe that the increasing use of technology in today's world has unwanted effects on young people's reading and writing skills. I strongly agree that can affect young

individuals

Use synonyms

' reading and writing skills. In

this

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day and age,

youngers

Correct your spelling

youngsters

show examples

are used to writing and reading on their electronic devices

such

Linking Words

as computers or mobile phones.

Teenagers

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read social

media

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stories of celebrities or of their

friends

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instead

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of digital books that can enrich their minds. Reading celebrities' or

friends

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' social

media

Use synonyms

makes

teenagers

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compare their lives with others.

Therefore

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, can lead young

individuals

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to sadness and depression if they do not feel that their life is as exciting as the other

individuals

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For example

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, a friend of mine when he was younger, was reading

friends

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' social

media

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comparing his life with others' lives.

This

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led him to a deep depression and almost committed suicide. Therapy and stopping reading

friends

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' social

media

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was key to his recovery. Using short vocabulary

while

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they communicate with electronic devices can affect negatively

teenagers

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' writing. One of the unwanted effects they can have using

for example

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mobile phones' chats is to develop more mistakes in formal writing.

The young

Correct article usage

Young

show examples

individuals

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can get used to writing on their phones using

this

Linking Words

short vocabulary, making them unable to recognize the right vocabulary in formal writing in high school

while

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they are learning.

For instance

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, one person I know when she was a teenager was communicating constantly by her mobile phone.

In addition

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this

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made her perform poorly when she was facing an exam, making a lot of mistakes that led to a low score in many subjects.

To conclude

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, I strongly agree that the increasing use of technology can have unwanted effects

such

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as making more mistakes in formal writing and raising the number of

teenagers

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suffering from sadness and depression reading

friends

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' or celebrities' social

media

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Submitted by jessica.pastor.87 on Thu Oct 03 2024

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coherence cohesion

Improve the logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Use linking phrases to connect ideas and make transitions more subtle.

task achievement

Enhance your task response by exploring a broader range of perspectives. Consider discussing potential positive impacts of technology on reading and writing to provide a balanced view.

coherence cohesion

The essay has both an introduction and a conclusion, providing a clear structure.

task achievement

You have provided relevant examples to support your main points, making your arguments more persuasive.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

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Some people think that the increasing use of computer and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on the young people reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people think that learning news from newspapers is the best way. Others, however, say that there are more effective ways of learning news from other media. Discuss both points of view and give your opinions

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nowadays, people use bicycle less as a form of transport. why this is a case? what can we do to encourage people to use bicycle more?

In some countries, if people need to find work, they have to move away from their families and their friends. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The growth of consumerism has led to a throw-away culture where people are more concerned with acquiring material possessions than protecting the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.