ou should spend about 40 minutes on this task. In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In a few nations, youth

decides

Correct subject-verb agreement

decide

show examples

to do apprenticeships

instead

Linking Words

of opting for higher

education

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

vocational training is a cost-effective option, the

long term

Add a hyphen

long-term

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career prospects benefit from university

education

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, in my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

going to college is essential for

adoloscents

Correct your spelling

adolescents

considering

downside

Add an article

the downside

show examples

of lack of

education

Use synonyms

. The major advantage of choosing vocational training over studying is cost-effectiveness, as university

education

Use synonyms

is expensive and students have to apply for

education

Use synonyms

loans.

For instance

Linking Words

instead

Linking Words

of applying for loans to study

further

Linking Words

for pursuing

Change preposition

to pursue

show examples

career

Add an article

a career

show examples

as an automotive technician, individuals can directly seek 6000 hours of apprenticeship and attain a similar status.

Also

Linking Words

, students start earning right away after secondary school by working full-time.

Thus

Linking Words

, work-based training is a feasible option, saving people a lot of money.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, the job opportunities and salaries offered are directly proportional to the educational qualifications alongside work experience.

For example

Linking Words

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

of the top executives of companies are recruited on

basis

Correct article usage

the basis

show examples

their

Change the word

the

show examples

qualifications listed on their job resumes.

Additionally

Linking Words

, through schooling people build connections and gain knowledge;

hence

Linking Words

, to achieve goals and higher positions on

professional

Add an article

the professional

a professional

show examples

front, studying is crucial. In conclusion, most of the youth choose to do vocational

traning

Correct your spelling

training

instead

Linking Words

of schooling. Whilst, it provides them monetary relief, as they start earning at a young age and don't have to take loans for

education

Use synonyms

, pursuing a degree is still

benefical

Correct your spelling

beneficial

for attaining high salary packages and attracting good job prospects.

Consequenlty

Correct your spelling

Consequently

, from my perspective, it is a viable option to opt for a degree before gaining

hands-on-experience

Correct your spelling

hands-on experience

show examples

bidingmehakjotThu Oct 03 2024

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task achievement

The essay provides a thoughtful response but can expand on specific examples to make the argument stronger. Consider incorporating more detailed examples to support your points, especially about long-term career benefits through higher education.

coherence cohesion

The structure is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, consider improving transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow and coherence of ideas.

task achievement

Ensure all points are fully developed. The essay mostly provides a balanced view but leans more towards the advantages of university education. It might be beneficial to acknowledge the reasons someone might still choose vocational training despite these advantages.

task achievement

The essay effectively balances the discussion of advantages and disadvantages, showing an understanding of both perspectives.

coherence cohesion

A conclusion is well-presented, effectively summarizing the discussion and stating a clear position.

coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates commendable structure, covering different aspects of the issue.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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