IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart below shows estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#minutes #bar #world #illiteracy #rates #region #gender #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Firstly
Linking Words
, the graphic gives information regarding estimated world illiteracy
rates
Use synonyms
, by region and by gender,
last
Linking Words
 year. After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 table has two categories and six countries. These are developed countries, Latin
American
Correct your spelling
America
show examples
, East
Asia
Use synonyms
, Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States and South
Asia
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, when we look at the chart south
Use synonyms
asia
Change the capitalization
Asia
show examples
 has less
rate
Use synonyms
 is 3%
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and much
rate
Use synonyms
 is 60%. Later
on
Add a comma
on,
show examples
 other less
rate
Use synonyms
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 East
Asia
Use synonyms
8
Change preposition
at 8
show examples
%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Sub-saharan
Asia
Use synonyms
 and Arab States are close to each
order
Correct your spelling
other
show examples
 in male
rates
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, South
Asia
Use synonyms
 has
top
Add an article
a top
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
30
Change preposition
of 30
show examples
% in
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
. As an extra South
Asia
Use synonyms
’s male
rates
Use synonyms
 and female
rates
Use synonyms
near
Add a missing verb
are near
show examples
 to each other.
Thirdly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 graphic which is above mentioned describes estimated world illiteracy
rates
Use synonyms
 by region and by gender for the
last
Linking Words
 year. The peak record is 60%
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 South
Asia
Use synonyms
 and a low ebb is 1%
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
Devoloped
Correct your spelling
Developed
 countries. From my point of view record high is female.
Submitted by eylulelveren7 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words rates, asia, rate with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: