Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices would help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Transport
pollution
is a big problem in many cities in the world today. Some people
think that government
investment in public transport
and reduction of prices will greatly help the fight against transport
pollution
. I totally agree with this
statement.
There are many people
that drive cars
in towns and cities and this
is a big problem because of the gridlocks and also
the pollution
that the cars
emit. This
fumes is really bad for the health. The government
needs to invest in public transport
so that less people
drive cars
. It is important that there is enough transport
for large numbers of people
and that the transport
is reliabil
and doesn’t break. The Correct your spelling
reliable
transport
system in Tokyo is very good and lots of people
use it.
Public transport
prices is
Change the verb form
are
also
a big problem. The price of the transport
needs to be low so that many people
can pay it. If the price is more expensive or the same as the car then
many people
use the car because it is cheap. The government
need to reduce prices, especially for people
with not many
money to pay it. In Correct quantifier usage
much
Beijing
the Add a comma
Beijing,
transport
is very cheap for
making Change preposition
apply
people
not drive their cars
.
In conclusion
I agree that public Add a comma
conclusion,
transport
is very important I think that transport
pollution
is a bad thing but it can be stopped by the government
is
they have more Correct your spelling
if
transport
and make the
Correct article usage
apply
transport
cheap for everybody. The transport
should also
be clean for the people
. But i
think there is too Change the capitalization
I
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
pollution
now so it will not be reduced.Submitted by bidingmehakjot on
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coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence, try to use more linking words and phrases to connect your ideas smoothly. This can make your essay easier to read and follow.
task achievement
Incorporate more detailed examples to support your main points. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer picture for the reader.
task achievement
Focus on expressing your ideas more clearly; this may involve breaking down complex ideas into simpler parts.
task achievement
The essay presents a complete response to the task, addressing both parts of the question effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and well identified, providing a good overall structure.
task achievement
Practical examples from Tokyo and Beijing are relevant and help illustrate the points being discussed.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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