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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017

the graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017
The line graph depicts the
number
Use synonyms
 of tourists visiting a Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 in
7-year
Add an article
a 7-year
the 7-year
show examples
 period.
Overall
Linking Words
,
total
Change the article
a total
the total
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number
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
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 grow considerably, with
satying
Correct your spelling
sitting
 on
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cruise
Correct article usage
the cruise
show examples
 overtaking staying on
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island's
Correct article usage
the island's
show examples
 popularity by mid-2015. In 2010, one
millions
Change to a singular noun
million
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visitors
Use synonyms
 visited the
island
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, the majority of whom
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to stay on
Use synonyms
island
Correct article usage
the island
show examples
 over
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
cruise
Use synonyms
. The
number
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
prefering
Correct your spelling
preferring
prefer
 to stay on
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island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 remained unchanged
untill
Correct your spelling
until
 early-2011, at almost 0.7
million
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. By the same time, the
number
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 of
visitors
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 staying on a
cruise
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 reached 0.5
million
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. From 2011 onward, the
number
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 of
visitors
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 staying on
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island
Add an article
the island
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 rose gradually to a high of 1.5
million
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 by 2013 and remained unaltered for the following 2
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
. The
number
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 of
visitors
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 staying on
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cruise
Add an article
a cruise
the cruise
show examples
,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, increased to just over 1
million
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 by 2015, before
witnwssing
Correct your spelling
witnessing
 a drop to its
inital
Correct your spelling
initial
number
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 by 2012. Between 2015 and 2016 total
number
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 of
visitors
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 plateaued. and by mid-2015 the
number
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 of
cruise
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 voyagers and those who stayed on the
island
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 were the same, at about 1.3
million
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. By the end of the
period
Add a comma
period,
show examples
cruise
Use synonyms
 was the
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 dwell for
visitors
Use synonyms
 as 2
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
 of
total
Correct article usage
a total
show examples
3.5
Change preposition
of 3.5
show examples
million
Use synonyms
peope
Correct your spelling
people
 stayed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a
cruise
Use synonyms
 for the time of their visit.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, island, visitors, cruise, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 8 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • trough
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • steady increase
  • sharp decline
  • seasonal variation
  • cruise ship visitors
  • island stay visitors
  • economic impact
  • environmental impact
  • tourism industry
  • sustainable tourism
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