People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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People
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ought to be able to save their all money,
instead
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of paying
taxes
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to the state.
Although
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I partially agree with
this
Linking Words
statement,
people
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should pay
taxes
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to have better
services
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in the country. On the one side,
people
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should keep all the money they earn.
Firstly
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, if
people
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were allowed to save their
earnings
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, they might be more motivated to
work
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harder and be more productive. It can increase
incentive
Add an article
the incentive
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to
work
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working
Verb problem
apply
show examples
without paying
taxes
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.
Secondly
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,
people
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have the right
ownership
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to ownership
show examples
of their
earnings
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because of their hard
work
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and
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tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
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may be
include
Wrong verb form
included
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their most of their
salary
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salaries
show examples
.
For example
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, the
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
taxes
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require more money and even rich families may
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
suffer from
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
taxes
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.
Therefore
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, the government should reduce the
taxes
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. On the other side,
people
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shoud
Correct your spelling
should
pay
taxes
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to the state. Paying
taxes
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can help to improve public
services
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in the country. Health care, education, emergency
services
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and transportation systems are largely financed through taxation. Without
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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funds, maintaining a high standard of living or even basic societal operations would be challenging.
For example
Linking Words
, roads and public schools would deteriorate without the necessary
financil
Correct your spelling
financial
support from
taxes
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. So,
people
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should separate a little part of their
earnings
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to
Change preposition
from
show examples
the
tax
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. In conclusion,
people
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should pay
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tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
from their
earnings
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to have better quality
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
public
services
Use synonyms
in the country. But most
people
Use synonyms
do not want to pay
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tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
. Because they may
be
Change the verb form
be working
show examples
work
Use synonyms
hard to
take
Verb problem
earn
show examples
their monthly salary.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider improving logical connectors to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that every paragraph supports the central argument and contributes to a cohesive overall message.
task achievement
Include more real-life examples to support your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
Aim to present more comprehensive ideas to fully cover different aspects of the question.
task achievement
The essay successfully presents a balanced view, acknowledging both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, adhering to the task requirements.
task achievement
You have raised important points about the benefits of paying taxes for public services, which adds strength to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute
  • welfare
  • public services
  • progressive taxation
  • distribution of wealth
  • civic duty
  • social cohesion
  • tax evasion
  • economic disparities
  • social unrest
  • individual rights
  • societal responsibilities
What to do next:
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