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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays, more and more people choose to do their shopping online instead of going to physical stores. Why is this so? What are the disadvantages of this trend?

#people #stores #trend
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With Increasing technology, many platforms are coming into the market for customers to do their shopping. People nowadays prefer to do online shopping rather than going to the stores. There are a lot of reasons and drawbacks regarding
this
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 situation.
This
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 essay will scrutinize both aspects of the quandary in the ensuing paragraph.
To begin
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 with, the consumer purchases the
products
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 easily because they do not want to waste their time and go to each store and look for the things that they need.
Furthermore
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, they have a wide range of
products
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 and they can compare the prices from the different shopping websites. Working women can easily order the daily essential groceries from the supermarket and can prepare foods for which they get the
delivery
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 on time and can contact the stores if there is a problem with
goods
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.
Although
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 online shopping has a plethora of benefits there are certain drawbacks
also
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. There are
also
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 chances that the
products
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 may be duplicated as compared to the physical stores because several websites are selling fake
goods
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 to grow their business.
Moreover
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, we get late
delivery
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 for the
goods
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 which we purchasing for which we are paying high
delivery
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 charges. There are some online websites in which the
products
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 are not refundable or returned. Walmart charges extra for dairy
goods
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delivery
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 but the consumer can get the stale
products
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. In conclusion, considering these points, from a personal perspective, without a shadow of a doubt, I am inclined to believe that online shopping is preferable in some cases but there are demerits to
this
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also
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.
Submitted by hetp3020 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your paragraphs to enhance logical progression of ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, supported by relevant examples, which follow a logical order.
task achievement
While you adequately respond to the task, ensure that you fully explore both the reasons and disadvantages you present. Adding more comprehensive and specific examples can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion clearly outline the essay's purpose and effectively set the stage for your arguments.
task achievement
You provide a complete response by discussing both the reasons why people shop online and the disadvantages of this trend.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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