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Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.
#tourists #caribbean #island
The line chart compares the
number
 of
visitors
 who visited in
Island
 from 2010 to 2017
Overall
,
it is clear that
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
number
 of
visitors
 who visited the
Island
 over the period increased significantly.
On the other hand
, the figure for the
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
 who who stayed on cruise ships and stayed on the
Island
while
,
visitors
 rose gradually from 2010 to 2017. In terms of
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
, the total
number
 of tourists a light increased
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 1
million
., it was rising from 2010 to 2015. The visitor’s
number
 of
million
 stood at around 2.7 in 2015 and 2016.
However
, the
visitors
Correct quantifier usage
number of visitors
show examples
 dramatically increased and reached a
peck
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 of 3.5 billion between 2016 to 2017. In 2010, the figure for
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
 who prepped to stay on chips ships was just slowly decreased in the years of 2010 and 2013.
In addition
, the
visitors
Correct quantifier usage
number of visitors
show examples
 staying on cruise ships gradually increased and reached
it
Change the pronoun
its
show examples
peck
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 of 2
million
 in 2017. On the
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 hand,
visitors
 stayed on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 and it had stood from 2010 to 2011.
However
,
visitors
stayed
Correct pronoun usage
who stayed
show examples
 on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 slowly rose in 2012 and 2015.
Then
 slightly decreased,again it increased and reached 1.5
million
 in 2017.
Submitted by mdtipusultanakhand on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, visitors, island, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • trough
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • steady increase
  • sharp decline
  • seasonal variation
  • cruise ship visitors
  • island stay visitors
  • economic impact
  • environmental impact
  • tourism industry
  • sustainable tourism
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