Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In an age of admiring strength, appealing for
collaboration
is not popular, and sometimes even considered as a sign of cowardice.
However
, I firmly believe that any
competition
is built upon
collaboration
to some degree. When we are involved in some
competition
or watch fierce games, we tend to overlook the fact that without acquiescent
collaboration
,
competition
could not exist.
For example
, the Celtics and the Mavericks, two NBA teams, have just finished their final in September
this
year. In their series games, they all desperately desired to be the final winner and thereby competed with each other, which,
however
, does not erase the basic fact that on the one
hand
, the players in one team have to collaborate to win;
on the other
hand
, the two teams need to follow some game rules together.
This
adequately suggests that
collaboration
, though usually eclipsed by the enthusiasm of
competition
, solidly underlies
competition
.
Nevertheless
, I am not intent on demonstrating
such
arguments as
competition
is worthless or
competition
is inferior to cooperation.
On the contrary
, I view
competition
as an indispensable complement to
collaboration
. Without
competition
,
collaboration
would easily lapse into various kinds of monopolies. For illustration, when Tesla, a giant in E-cars, had no competitors in the market before 2015, its popular model sold at 500, 000 yuan. As a comparison,
due to
the rapid growth of other car companies, like Xiaopeng, Lixiang, and BYD, Tesla has lost its monopoly and decided to form a strategic
collaboration
relationship with other major private car companies to cultivate a flourishing car market.
This
indicates that
competition
can contribute to beneficial
collaboration
. To summarise, on the one
hand
,
competition
can be a good complement to
collaboration
;
on the other
hand
,
collaboration
is radically important for the existence of
competition
.
Therefore
, we should achieve a balance between them, and if that cannot be realised, maintaining cooperation is more important.
Submitted by hx88375757 on

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task achievement
Strengthen some of your supporting points by elaborating a bit more to reinforce your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Consider using clearer topic sentences to guide the reader more effectively through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to maintain a clear and flowing narrative.
task achievement
You have a well-developed argument that shows a clear understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The examples provided, such as the NBA teams and Tesla, enhance your argument effectively and are relevant to the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a structured response to the question.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow and connection of ideas are strong, aiding in comprehension of your arguments.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
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