many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. what are the causes of the problem? how to overcome it?

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The phenomenon of how many people
is
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are
show examples
achieving
balance
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a balance
the balance
show examples
of
work
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-life is a global issue that can have
concequences
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consequences
.
This
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essay will
disscuss
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discuss
the problems arising
Linking Words
this
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from this
show examples
disparity and propose potential solutions. One of the major problems resulting from labour-life balance is taking a good career. As employees
which
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who
show examples
work
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in fabric or
company
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that urge
staff
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for 24
hours
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in
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apply
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a day especially if there are urgent tasks
must
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that must
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be accomplished, leading to high responsibility and
good
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a good
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probability of career prospects for those
staff
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. As
consequence
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a consequence
show examples
, it can reduce
free
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the free
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time
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that must be available for family or hobbies. Another issue is depending on their supervisors or managers, on the one hand, people which has a good leader and respect
to
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for
show examples
break
time
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or
work
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time
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,
they
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apply
show examples
can tackle many tasks
while
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the
staff
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are not around.
Conversely
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, supervisors
which
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who
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lack
of
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apply
show examples
competence,
they
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apply
show examples
mostly give
the
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apply
show examples
task
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tasks
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to their
staff
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Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
when
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the
time
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is not for
work
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.
This
Linking Words
can lead to a lower quality of life for
labours
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labourers
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and limit their personal
time
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. To address these problems, several measures can be taken.
Firstly
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, there should be a bold
in
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apply
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rule of the
company
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that can be divided by private
time
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and
work
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time
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.
This
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includes the responsibility of their management to not disturb their
staff
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while
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in
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at
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weekends.
Company
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initiatives aim at increasing
work
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time
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quality and supporting their
staff
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to socialize in
out of
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out-of-work
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work
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circumtances
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circumstances
.
Furthermore
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, flexible
hours
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can be the option
to
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for
show examples
individuals in these days to choose what
time
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that they are available to
work
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. With the right implementation,
labours
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labourers
show examples
can develop their creativities as an outcome without needing to complain.
Moreover
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,
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company
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the company
a company
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can limit
labours
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labours'
labour's
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time
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such
Linking Words
as in a month,
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when worker
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worker
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workers
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have to spend 800
hours
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no matter which days and
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time
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times
show examples
. In conclusion, the disparity in how many people to
rising
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rise
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work
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-life
balanced
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balance
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because
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is because
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of taking good chances or
depends
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depending
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on their boss. To address
this
Linking Words
,
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company
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the company
show examples
has to make a bold for their rules and consider
to give
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giving
show examples
flexible
hours
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
their
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
Try to use more specific examples or evidence to support your points. It will enhance the credibility and strength of your argument.
task achievement
Improve clarity by refining some complex sentences to ensure ideas are expressed clearly and comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more varied and accurate vocabulary to express your ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the discussion well.
coherence cohesion
There is a noticeable effort to structure the essay logically, with distinct paragraphs discussing problems and solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • burnout
  • flexible work arrangements
  • remote work
  • unplug
  • boundaries
  • workplace culture
  • societal pressure
  • stress management
  • time management
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