IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below. ·You should write at least 150 words. ·You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

#report #university #lecturer #information #·you #minutes
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The given diagram illustrates the figure
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 expenditure on three categories of fast
food
 by high, average and
low
Add a hyphen
low-income
show examples
income
groups
 in the UK during 1990.
Overall
,
while
 hamburgers were a popular product for high and
average
Add a hyphen
average-income
show examples
income
groups
,
people
 in
low
Add a hyphen
low-income
show examples
income
groups
 preferred to consume fish and chips,
pizza
Correct word choice
and pizza
show examples
 products had the lowest consumption in the perspective view. Hamburgers were popular in both high and average
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
 when they spent nearly 42 and 30
pounds
 per
week
 to buy
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, respectively.
In contrast
, if the second rank of expenditure on fast
food
 in
high
Add a hyphen
high-income
show examples
income
groups
 was pizza with 18
pounds
,
people
 in average salary
groups
 spend only 12
pounds
 per
week
 for it.
In contrast
, around 25
pounds
 per
week
 was paid for buying fish and chips products
while
people
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 high
income
 pay only 16
pounds
 a
week
 for
this
 kind of
food
.
According to
 the rest
groups
, fish and chips
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the most popular product in the
low
Add a hyphen
low-income
show examples
income
 graph, with roughly 17
pounds
 being paid weekly.
This
 figure was followed by the consumption of
hamburger
Fix the agreement mistake
hamburgers
show examples
 was only 6
pounds
 higher,
while
 the number of
people
 purchasing pizza was 7
pounds
 per
week
 which is the least common
food
 product in the given graph.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Work on improving transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the logical flow of the report.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include a clear introduction and a summarizing conclusion to increase clarity and completeness.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific data analysis of the low-income group's spending habits for greater depth.
Task Achievement
Clarify some of the sentence structures that might be slightly confusing, such as 'people in average salary groups spend only 12 pounds.'
Task Achievement
The report effectively covers the spending habits of different income groups.
Task Achievement
Main points are supported with relevant data, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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