Some people prefer to listen to music while studying, as music has a calming effect on the mind. Others prefer a pin drop silence in order to concentrate on the content they are studying and have an undivided attention while they do so.Which option works better for you and why do you think the other option is not viable to ensure a successful

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some
people
Use synonyms
listen to
music
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
they
study
Use synonyms
because the melody calms the mind. Meanwhile, others prefer to
study
Use synonyms
in
silence
Use synonyms
because it helps to focus and concentrate.
Although
Linking Words
everyone has their own preferences, studying in
silence
Use synonyms
is more
preferrable
Correct your spelling
preferable
show examples
since our mind is not disturbed
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
sounds.
Firstly
Linking Words
, listening to
music
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
studying causes the brain to proceed more than one thing at once which will get many
people
Use synonyms
distracted.
This
Linking Words
distraction will disturb the
overall
Linking Words
focus of the studying process, and it often
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
them to lose interest to continue studying.
For instance
Linking Words
, a library never
play
Change the verb form
plays
show examples
background
music
Use synonyms
for
people
Use synonyms
to listen
Linking Words
while
Change preposition
to while
show examples
they read or
study
Use synonyms
because a lot of
people
Use synonyms
tend to focus more
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
silence
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, studying works best in a convenient and quiet place
such
Linking Words
as in the library.
In addition
Linking Words
, studying in
silence
Use synonyms
helps the mind to get less overwhelmed. It is certain that everyone gets to learn about a very hard task or assignment at least once, and even
such
Linking Words
calming
music
Use synonyms
can be
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
bothersome during
this
Linking Words
moment.
For example
Linking Words
, a friend of mine who was an avid
music
Use synonyms
listener had to stop the
music
Use synonyms
as she had to finish a syntax assignment in a
40 minutes
Correct your spelling
40-minute
deadline.
As a result
Linking Words
, studying with no sound can help
people
Use synonyms
to feel less stressed when they have to get something done quickly. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
some
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
majority of
people
Use synonyms
prefer to
study
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
the company of
music
Use synonyms
, I believe that studying in
silence
Use synonyms
offers better benefits as it prevents
people
Use synonyms
from getting distracted and it will make studying less overwhelming.
Submitted by ameliahanakaru01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay should provide more specific examples and analysis to strengthen the argument for why silence works better for studying.
coherence cohesion
While the logical structure flows well, the essay could benefit from clearer transitions between ideas and stronger links throughout the text.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame the discussion.
task achievement
The response fully addresses the prompt and clearly states a preference with supporting reasons.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • calming effect
  • pin drop silence
  • undivided attention
  • focus and concentration
  • reducing stress levels
  • background music
  • improve mood
  • better productivity
  • information retention
  • auditory distraction
  • process complex information
  • deep concentration
  • critical thinking
  • enhance creativity
  • analytical tasks
  • detailed-oriented tasks
What to do next:
Look at other essays: