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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the number of visitors to four international museums between 1980 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the number of visitors to four international museums between 1980 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph illustrates the number of visitors to four international museums from 1980 to 2015. Each point represents two
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 intervals for the particular year, and there are several key features which are set out below.
First,
Linking Words
there was one international
museum
Use synonyms
 that experienced an upward
trend
Use synonyms
.
Vatican
Correct article usage
The Vatican
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
 started
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
five
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 in 1980 and ended with nine
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 in 2015, making
Vatican
Correct article usage
the Vatican
show examples
 one of the most visited
Use synonyms
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
.
Second,
Linking Words
there was one international
museum
Use synonyms
 that experienced a downward
trend
Use synonyms
. London Science
Museum
Use synonyms
 started at four
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1980 and it decreased to two
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2015.
Lastly
Linking Words
, there were two international
Use synonyms
museum
Change to a plural noun
museums
show examples
 that experienced a
fluctuated
Replace the word
fluctuating
show examples
trend
Use synonyms
. Shenzhen visitors started at three
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 and went up to four
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
. The second
museum
Use synonyms
 that experienced
Correct article usage
a fluctuated
show examples
fluctuated
Wrong verb form
fluctuating
show examples
trend
Use synonyms
 is
Louvre
Correct article usage
the Louvre
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
, which started
at
Change preposition
with
show examples
 eight
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 and ended with nine
million
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, throughout the
35 years
Correct your spelling
35-year
 period, Louvre and Vatican
museums
Capitalize word
Museums
show examples
 had the most visitors compared to other international museums.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words million, people, museum, trend with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • visitor numbers
  • trend analysis
  • stability
  • popularity
  • significant changes
  • peak periods
  • low points
  • global tourism trends
  • economic downturns
  • natural disasters
  • tourist patterns
  • dynamic nature
  • factors influencing
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