An increasing number of children are overweight which could result many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and healtg care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

Recently, many children
are
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
overweight, which leads to their health problems. Outweigh in children is most often
associate
Wrong verb form
associated
show examples
with several factors
such
as poor
diet
, a sedentary lifestyle and psychological factors.
This
essay will examine the reasons and solutions  The first problem,
improper
Add a missing verb
is improper
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nutrition. There can be many reasons for poor appetite. Like,An improperly constructed daily routine, few walks in the fresh air, insufficient physical
activity
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
diet
does not meet the needs of the baby. Kids with bad eating habits do not receive the necessary amount of nutrients for good health.
For example
, young people who
eating
Wrong verb form
eat
show examples
poorly as a rule, they have a weaker immune system, which increases their chances of getting sick. The solution
Change preposition
to
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
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this
problem is
balanced
Add an article
a balanced
show examples
diet
. It is important to follow a
diet
and quality of food, decrease the amount of sweets, oily products and fast foods, increasing vegetables, fruits
also
whole grains. The second reason
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
the inactive lifestyle. Children have been spending more time behind the screen lately, which reduces their
activity
and physical fitness.
For
instance
Add a comma
instance,
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a healthy body affects
for
Change preposition
apply
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a good mood, productivity development and strong health.
However
, excess weight can
dicrease
Correct your spelling
decrease
increase
immune systems when
Add an article
a kid
the kid
show examples
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
show examples
can get easily sick. To solve
this
problem,
firstly
parents can make a food more appetising and
kid
Add an article
the kid
show examples
probably will want to eat it. The view is
also
very important so as not to lose the child's appetite.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
it's no need to force them to eat what they don't want. There is plenty of good nutrition which
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
show examples
will like
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. If she doesn't like broccoli, she probably likes something else, it doesn't have to be one thing.
Secondly
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
physical
activity
where
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
show examples
regularly
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
exercise or light activities like walking in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fresh air
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
helps to support
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthy fitness. In conclusion, by creating healthier habits and promoting physical
activity
, we can
Correct your spelling
effectively
show examples
affectively
Correct your spelling
effectively
show examples
combat childhood obesity and ensure
brighter
Correct article usage
a brighter
show examples
, good future for
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
generations
Submitted by aluagabitova on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your main points. For instance, mention specific studies or statistics about children's weight-related health issues.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay follows a clear logical structure with each paragraph smoothly transitioning to the next. This will enhance readability.
task achievement
Clarify your points a bit more, especially how psychological factors contribute to childhood obesity. This will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a well-rounded argument.
task achievement
The paper successfully identifies key reasons for childhood obesity and offers solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical progression of ideas and addresses the problem and solutions in a structured manner.

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