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Band 6.5

Genetic engineering is dangerous trend. It should be limited. To what extent do you agree? Give reasons for your answear aand include any releveant examples from your own knowledge or expirience.

#trend #answear #aand #releveant #expirience
In today's world, many technologies
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
improve our lives in better ways. Genetic engineering is one of the quite risky trends that has been going on for the past dozens of years. I hold the view, that scientist have to be limited in their actions with genetic engineering. Primarily,
this
 technology isn'
t
 so much researched and a majority of
people
 don'
t
 understand the complete seriousness of
this
 situation.
Above all
 the experiences that had been finished none of them had been tested on a single person, so that trend was absolutely harmful in any way.
For instance
, no one is immune from some accidents which could destroy the whole life just after one operation with your gens. In my personal opinion, we can do
this
 only with special kids or part of the population who have serious congenital diseases.
Therefore
, it's the only possible method without any unsecured consequences because these
people
 already need external intervention.
However
,
people
 have to go through serious observation and preparation,
such
 as control of health, bad habits or allergic reactions. Gladly, I don'
t
 have any examples from my own experience. I hadn'
t
 encountered an issue like
this
 before and my closest
people
. I've seen a soldier on social media, who was asking Elon Musk for a chip that could help him with his blindness. I reckon these trends should succour
people
 like
this
 and rid them of their ailments. In conclusion, there are some possible methods which could help diseased
people
,
besides
 the completely healthy part of the world's population.
Submitted by stepanantoniuk07 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure of the essay, consider using clearer transitions between points. This will help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. Including relevant case studies or published findings on genetic engineering could strengthen your arguments significantly.
task achievement
Ensure each paragraph clearly supports your main thesis. Adding more supporting details or scenarios can enhance comprehension.
task achievement
You've addressed the topic directly and outlined your main position on genetic engineering clearly in the introduction.
task achievement
The inclusion of a personal perspective adds authenticity and relatability to the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance, providing a satisfying closure to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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