It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
In the contemporary era, some
people
hold the view that putting aside is a crucial issue for youth. I wholeheartedly agree with this
statement because whenever these young individuals become old, they have an adequate budget to spend on several sectors, and they can spend their money
on more vital items that enable them to achieve accomplishments in their lives.
On the one hand, it is obvious that elderly members of the public are not able to work for long hours or they are retired; thus
they have a necessity to save money
for the time that they can not obtain money
. In addition
, if they do not collect money
in their youth, not only will they not have the ability to spend on recreational activities, but they also
will not take care of themselves. For instance
, it can be seen numerous homeless old-aged
Correct your spelling
old
people
who are from Iran disclose that their circumstances are rooted in spending money
on unimportant items like drugs, substances, and cigarettes.
Further
and even more importantly, young generations must save money
to spend it on vital tasks to be successful in their lives. Indeed, saving money
assists young people
in purchasing desirable accommodations, cars
, and engaging in useful workshops that are expensive and helpful for their progress. Correct word choice
and cars
For example
, Ielts
classes are significantly pricy, Correct your spelling
IELTS
hence
whether students want to have success in this
exam, they need to have a huge amount of money
that is
impossible without saving.
In conclusion, collecting money
and not wasting money
have
Verb problem
are
importance
in Replace the word
important
people
's lives. From my standpoint, saving money
has many benefits, such
as having a better situation in their retirement and reaching prominent goals that they have.Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on
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task achievement
Expand on the connection between saving money and achieving success. Provide more specific examples of how saved money is used to accomplish life goals.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each main point is supported with concrete examples or explanations to enhance clarity and understanding for the reader.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a strong framework for the response.
task achievement
The topic is addressed effectively, with a complete response that covers the necessity of saving money for young people.