Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both views and give your oponion.

Some believe that it is essential to share as much
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
as possible for academic, business and
scienfic
Correct your spelling
scientific
research.
However
, critics argue that some
information
must be kept private as it is too important and valuable to be shared freely. I hereby agree with the latter opinion as most of the details can be used as a weapon against us. First and foremost, sharing
information
for academic, business and scientific research allows for
deeper
Correct article usage
a deeper
show examples
understanding of the circumstances
thus
, resulting in a more accurate and effective solution. The
information
helps to break down a problem into smaller and manageable
chucks
Correct your spelling
chunks
show examples
further
laying the foundation for research and advancements in a particular field. A man had a hole in his abdomen and sharing the details allowed the doctors to analyze, test and evaluate the solution and
this
had
Verb problem
apply
show examples
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
to
cure
Correct article usage
a cure
show examples
formation that has saved the lives of millions.
However
, critics argue that the notion of sharing
information
in abundance without considering the
concequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
to bear
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
leads to
information
being used against the individual who shared them.
A companies
Correct the article-noun agreement
A company
Companies
show examples
named "RedBull" launched a campaign to boost their sales and eventually lost millions in a lawsuit. The company's advertisement had a phrase - "
RedBull
Correct your spelling
Red Bull
show examples
gives you wings." which served as evidence for misinformation. In conclusion, sharing as much
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
as possible is flawed and individuals should take the
concequeses
Correct your spelling
consequences
into consideration before sharing their personal, important and valuable
information
freely.
Submitted by gurvirsingh.baraich on

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task achievement
Clarify the example about the man with a hole in his abdomen. While it's intriguing, it needs more context to show how it supports your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that the counterargument about Red Bull is more closely tied to the main topic of academic and scientific research, perhaps by explicitly explaining its relevance.
coherence cohesion
Make sure the conclusion summarizes both viewpoints clearly and shows the connection to your personal opinion for a balanced closure.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction provides a clear statement of both sides of the argument and includes your own stance.
logical structure
The essay is well-structured with separate paragraphs for arguments and counterarguments, contributing to overall logical flow.
supported main points
The essay offers examples to illustrate points, enhancing the reader's understanding where they are relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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