In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if the try hard enough What are the advantage and disadvantages of giving children this massage?

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it is a contentious debate, for some countries telling
children
advices
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advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
like, anything can
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be achive
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achive
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achieved
with
hardworking
Correct word choice
hard work
show examples
.
this
essay will examine some
poits
Correct your spelling
points
posts
regarding to advantages and
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
in the next paragraphs.
To begin
with, somehow we
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
imagine how great we are, how capable we are until we try, put quite
efforts
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effort
show examples
to
persuae
Correct your spelling
persuade
pursue
things
we want. There are
numerious
Correct your spelling
numerous
benefit
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benefits
show examples
if
tell
Wrong verb form
telling
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children
that hard work
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
anything.
firstly
Capitalize word
Firstly
show examples
,
this
statement could encourage
childen
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children
and keep
motivated
Correct pronoun usage
them motivated
show examples
to put an
enffort
Correct your spelling
effort
for
things
,
for example
, when
chilren
Correct your spelling
children
say they barely quit
study
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studying
show examples
because they
tired
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are tired
show examples
,
this
statement can
motivated
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motivate
show examples
them to keep study, with hope can pass the exam.
However
,
this
also
bring
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brings
show examples
the drawback for chilren,
such
as, create trust
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
, when
children
told
Add a missing verb
are told
show examples
that everything can
Add a missing verb
be achive
show examples
achive
Correct your spelling
achieved
,
however
, not
everythings
Correct your spelling
everything
works as we planned,
there
Correct word choice
and there
show examples
are some
parameter
Fix the agreement mistake
parameters
show examples
that we have account to
how
Change preposition
for how
show examples
things
will
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
.
This
statement could make
children
loose
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lose
show examples
their desire to learn more and more.
For instance
,
chillren
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children
under 5
easier
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have easier
show examples
to process
Change the verb form
processing
show examples
information, when we give them hope, it will
be working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
as
log
Correct your spelling
long
show examples
as they do it with hard work. One
things
Change to a singular noun
thing
show examples
not
works
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
like they
pridicted
Correct your spelling
predicted
they will tell us a
lier
Correct your spelling
liar
show examples
, or simply not trust us anymore.
To conclude
, telling advice to
children
not
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does not
show examples
always
give
Verb problem
have
show examples
a
positve
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positive
impacts
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impact
show examples
, not every
children
Change to a singular noun
child
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
the
sampe respons
Correct your spelling
same response
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
things
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
it
Correct word choice
so it
show examples
is important to tell the truth to
children
.
children
have to put hard work
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
things
, because it is the most significant parameter to
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
archive
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
,
hoewever
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however
its
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
good to consider other parameters to face a failing.
Submitted by masry.pakpahan on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve sentence structure and grammar for better clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use more varied sentence structures to enhance readability.
Task Achievement
Ensure all parts of the question are addressed more thoroughly.
Task Achievement
Expand on ideas with concrete examples.
Task Achievement
You have presented both advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything with hard work.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay clearly identifies the topic and provides an introduction and conclusion.

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