Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and state your opinion.
While
it is widely debated that hosting an international
Correct the article-noun agreement
an international sport event
international sport events
sport
Change the noun form
sports
events
could bring tremendous benefits for the nations, others argue that it is bad for the locals as it offer
opportunities to convict Change the verb form
offers
a crimes
. Both Correct the article-noun agreement
crimes
a crime
point
of Fix the agreement mistake
points
views
and Fix the agreement mistake
view
reason
why I support the former claim seeing that it promotes Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
tourisms
and Fix the agreement mistake
tourism
offer
jobs for the locals will be discussed Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
further
in this
essay.
To begin
with, it may seem sensible for some to believe that held
up Wrong verb form
holding
an international sport
Correct the article-noun agreement
international sport events
an international sport event
events
such
as the Olympics could immensely improve the development of that nations
, especially Change the determiner
that nation
those nations
infrastructures
. To simply explain, when hosting such
global events
, it attracts visitors worldwide will
travel to Correct pronoun usage
who will
Correct article usage
the host's
host's
nation. In Change noun form
host
this
sense, the government must represent their countries with good images resulting in allocating their expenditures on
improving better quality of Change preposition
to
infrastructures
in order to fascinate the eye's
of the global sight. Take Korea, Change the noun form
eyes
eye
for example
; prior to Olympic
games, there were neither large stadiums nor good Correct article usage
the Olympic
infrastructures
. After being the host, the fast development and constructions
Fix the agreement mistake
construction
converting
Wrong verb form
converted
the
Correct article usage
apply
old-fashion
Correct your spelling
old-fashioned
korea
into a Change the capitalization
Korea
westernized
and modern town.
Capitalize word
Westernized
Therefore
, many opponents of this
idea might opposed
that sometimes Verb problem
think
this
event can attract people with bad intentions to commit a crime. It is often report
that during large Change the verb form
is often reported
event
the rate of pick-pocket Fix the agreement mistake
events
were
on the rise as they Change the verb form
was
use
the advantage of cheerful crowds to do so. Wrong verb form
used
While
people enjoy the match that
sometimes Correct word choice
but
forget
about their valuables, these can be easily targeted by Change the verb form
forgets
theives
.
From my perspective, I personally agree that being a host of Correct your spelling
thieves
this
crucial Correct determiner usage
these
events
can benefit the countries especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
on
tourism. Change preposition
in
As loads
of visitor will travel across the globe to cheer for their nation.
In summary, Correct word choice
Loads
although
it is undeniable that hosting a global
Correct the article-noun agreement
global events
a global event
events
like sport
competitions can bring positive outcomes for the country Change the noun form
sports
such
as the improvement of infrastructures
, possible threats like thieves should not be neglected. Hence
, I am of the opinion that their advantages outweight
the aforementioned detrimental effects, provided that measures.Correct your spelling
outweigh
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar to avoid confusing sentences.
Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly and directly address all parts of the essay prompt.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion by presenting both sides of the argument on hosting international sports events.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed, providing a clear roadmap for the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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