Some people think that it is better to build more public parks and sports facilities in new town rather shopping malls. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is a widely held view that a new city plan should include more recreational areas
such
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as public parks, gardens, and
sports
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grounds and fewer shopping malls. I wholeheartedly agree with the notion because they play a significant role in human health and well-being. First of all, the green areas
such
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as tree plantings are considered and known as
Correct article usage
the
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‘lungs’ of a city. They are especially significant for modern cities taking into account the heavy traffic situation and air pollution because they absorb deleterious gases
such
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as Carbon Dioxide and release oxygen which enables animals and human beings to survive.
As well as
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this
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, trees provide shadows in the summer and
as a result
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reduce
overall
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heat in a city,
thus
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they can have a positive knock-on effect on eliminating universal issues like global warming. On the other side,
sports
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amenities
as well as
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green spaces contribute to eliminating anxiety and other serious mental issues. To illustrate, spending some time out is beneficial for everyone to stay sane and to strengthen both mental and physical health,
therefore
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it is a golden opportunity to recharge the battery and to chill out.
In addition
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to that, workout grounds located in public areas encourage people to do exercise,
such
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as running, walking, do yoga. Taking into account a growing number of overweight people, the availability of free
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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facilities is steadily becoming highly important.
This
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is because many are not able to purchase overpriced membership to a
sports
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club and street
sports
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facilities may be a better alternative for it. In conclusion, As was mentioned before, I totally agree that in planning a new town the policymakers should construct more
sports
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facilities and parks by allocating more budget rather than shopping malls because from sportsmen and coaches, in order to be healthy we require fitness clubs and
sports
Use synonyms
items
instead
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of shopping malls and outlets.
Submitted by yektaghandi.78 on

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coherence cohesion
Provide a clearer outline of your argument in the introduction to guide the reader.
task achievement
Ensure your points are evenly developed, with each paragraph exploring a different aspect of the topic.
coherence cohesion
You have clearly structured your essay with an introduction, main body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You utilized relevant examples, such as the role of trees in reducing pollution and promoting health, to support your arguments.
task achievement
You presented comprehensive ideas about the positive impacts of parks and sports facilities.
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