IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employee rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

#people #self-employee #work #company #organization #be #case
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Self-employee
 is a contentious issue debate.
Wheras
Correct your spelling
Whereas
 many people prefer to work for themselves rather than work for a certain company.
This
 essay will examine some advantages and disadvantages of being
self-employee
Correct article usage
a self-employee
show examples
.
To begin
 with, there are some advantages to
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
self-employeed
Correct your spelling
self-employed
.
Firstly
, flexible time, as an employee for
ownselft
Correct your spelling
ownself
oneself
, someone has
fully
Change the word
full
show examples
authorities
Fix the agreement mistake
authority
show examples
 for the time
mangement
Correct your spelling
management
 regardless obey some regulation from management.
Furthermore
, all revenue is on you, the most important is you can manage your profit.
For example
, someone who has
property
Correct article usage
a property
show examples
business
 and can
sale
Replace the word
sell
show examples
 his/her property without
third
Add an article
a third
show examples
 party,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
means all
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
 will be hers/his. Despite there
are
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 advantages, it's undeniable that
this
self-employee
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
 some consequences,
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 lost profit. it's
obiously
Correct your spelling
obviously
 clear that
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 your own
business
 is not as easy as you imagined. When
plan
Add an article
the plan
a plan
show examples
 is not working as we expected and
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to
broke
Correct word choice
broken
show examples
 profit, someone could
loose
Correct your spelling
lose
show examples
 their
ownself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
alone. The other
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
show examples
 that should be
encounter
Wrong verb form
encountered
show examples
 is how to
managed
Wrong verb form
manage
show examples
business
Correct article usage
a business
show examples
 by yourself. Running a
business
 means you have sufficient ability in a
business
 from operation, marketing, financial, and management.
For instance
, knowing all parts
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a
business
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to a successful
business
.
To conclude
, running a
business
 or
to be
Change the verb form
being
show examples
self-employee
Correct article usage
a self-employee
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 many drawbacks,
such
 as
possibility
Add an article
the possibility
show examples
to lose
Change preposition
of losing
show examples
 profits and
business
Correct article usage
the business
show examples
 ability required.
Submitted by masry.pakpahan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Clarify the main argument in the introduction to provide a clear overview of the essay's purpose.
task achievement
Give more specific examples to support your points, ensuring they directly relate to the advantages and disadvantages discussed.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas by linking paragraphs and sentences more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Use more transitional phrases to enhance the connection between points.
grammar vocabulary
Avoid grammatical errors and ensure subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the essay.
task achievement
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages of being self-employed, addressing the task prompt effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a basic structure to the essay.
task achievement
Attempts to provide examples is a good approach to support the main ideas, even if the examples need to be more detailed.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: