Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices oneveryday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in asociety of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other peoplebelieve that it is important for children to make decisions about matters thataff ect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Other people think that providing the youth with options in everyday life will end up
to be
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being
show examples
self-centered
Change the spelling
self-centred
show examples
on the
sociatal
Correct your spelling
societal
social
level.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
some people consider the importance of allowing children to make
decisions
especially those that
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
them. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will discuss two views and personal takes on the decision. On one hand, creating
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young minds to be able to select options or make
decisions
will mean a lot to them.
Additionally
, one of its advantages
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
allowing them to take part
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
decisions
is the development of empowerment.
Thus
,
as a result
of empowering children, they will become independent individuals.
For instance
, when choosing a summer class to
enroll
Change the spelling
enrol
show examples
,
Change preposition
in, instead
show examples
instead
of
dectating
Correct your spelling
dictating
what is right or wrong, let the person choose.
As a result
, the kid will use their critical thinking skills
on considering
Change preposition
to consider
show examples
the factors of wants, needs, and
helpful
Replace the word
helpfulness
show examples
.
Additionally
,
independece
Correct your spelling
independence
will come along as they are trained to make
decisions
by themselves and will not ask their parents
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
what to do in the future.
On the other hand
, other people thought that letting the child decide on everyday choices
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
only make them think solely
on
Change preposition
about
show examples
themselves.
This
is
due to
parents having
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
show examples
concept
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
what sparks selfishness and rebellion
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
teenagers. Other parental figures think that giving them freedom to choose would result
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
abuse of power and make them end up only choosing things that are good for them.
However
, I personally disagree with
this
idea. If only they were given
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
guidance and freedom
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
decisons
Correct your spelling
decisions
,
then
they
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
perform
their
Change preposition
at their
show examples
maximum potential. Personally, allowing minors to decide freely weighs more
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
compared to restricting them.
Furthermore
, it is not
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
freedom of decision that makes the person
self-centered
Change the spelling
self-centred
show examples
but rather different factors
such
as insensitivity and inconsideration. To sum it up, having the child decide on the things that matter to them
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
more beneficial compared to
remowing
Correct your spelling
removing
mowing
their power
on making
Change preposition
to make
show examples
decisions
.
Additionally
, there are positive outcomes from allowing them to decide
such
as empowerment and
indepenence
Correct your spelling
independence
.
Although
, there is an idea that restricting them on
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
show examples
will potentially not make them
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
selfish or rebellious individuals.
Submitted by emmagallares on

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clarity
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language
Ensure that you consistently use correct grammar and spelling to enhance readability and professionalism.
supporting evidence
Provide more detailed examples or anecdotes that strongly support your point. This will help substantiate your arguments and make them more persuasive.
balance
Try to balance the discussion by elaborating equally on both views in the body paragraphs. This will demonstrate a thorough exploration of the topic.
structure
The essay includes a strong introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
personal touch
Your personal opinion is well stated and adds a unique perspective to the essay.
task understanding
The essay successfully addresses the task by discussing both views and providing an opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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