In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.
People
have different opinions on pupils deciding to work or travel
for a year
between finishing high school and starting university studies. In this
essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the decision.
For the advantage side, young people
choose work or travel
first instead
of getting into college
is they will have more experience
or financial support for life
, for example
, young people
who chosen work for a year
, not only earn the tuition fee which is college
need to charge, but also
have more experience
of searching the hobbit of life
, through to the job
, it can learn life
skills and job
skills, meanwhile, can help to decide the college
major which is the interest for, On the other hand
, chose to travel
can experience
which country prefers to live, and what the lifestyle is it because the college
does not require to stay at hometown, it can be anywhere in the earth, thus
the reason, during the travel
can experient the local life
and the job
market. The gap
year
is helpful to make a life
decision.
For the disadvantages side, those people
who chose a gap
year
will need to delay their bachelor's degree one more year
, which causes less competitiveness in entering the job
market, and seeing the same age friend already being a good workforce for society becomes stressful, it is very hard to no competitive with friends or classmates, Moreover
, elderly seems the gap
year
experience
like a relax of life
, it is waste of time and meaningfulness. Society tends to see gap
year
as a runaway decision of live duty, during the interview of college
, they will notice the difference between the student who does not choose to have a gap
year
, and the interviewer will hope that there is a reasonable reason for the gap
year
.
Overall
, working or travelling for a year
between finishing high school and starting university studies has both sides of advantages and disadvantages, that is
no correct answer to it, chose one that will not regret, and enjoy it.Submitted by meniwii.c on
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coherence cohesion
Consider defining paragraphs more distinctly. Each main point should be in its own paragraph, with a clear beginning and end.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas. Ensure each sentence naturally leads to the next and that linking words or phrases are used to guide the reader.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity of ideas by rephrasing or elaborating on certain points, such as financial support benefits or cultural experiences during travel.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or scenarios to support claims, especially when discussing social perceptions and job market competitiveness.
coherence cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion topic.
task achievement
The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages, offering a balanced view on the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.