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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

discuss the advantages and disadvantages of watching TV for children.

#tv #children
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Nowadays, it is becoming increasingly popular for
children
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 to spend the majority of their spare
time
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 watching
television
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.
This
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 shift
on
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in
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 how
children
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 use their leisure
time
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 has sparked debates about its potential effects on their cognitive and social development. But what are the benefits of
this
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 situation? And what are the drawbacks? In
this
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 essay, I will examine both sides and try to draw some conclusions. I will start by looking at the advantages. One of the major advantages of watching
television
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 for
childrenis
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children is
children
 can be its educational value. Many programs are designed to teach
children
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 important concepts in subjects like science, history, and language. Recent studies
has
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have
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 proven the positive impact of these kinds of programs on young
children
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.
Additionally
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,
television
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 can expose
children
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 to different cultures, ideas, and perspectives, broadening their understanding of the world. It may help them develop empathy and awareness of global issues, and make them better citizens of the world.
On the other hand
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,
exessive
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excessive
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television
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 watching can have negative effects. One major concern is that too much screen
time
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 can lead to a sedentary lifestyle, which can cause childhood
obisity
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obesity
.
Children
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 who spend long hours in front of the TV, tend to have less physical and social activity, which is essential for their physical and mental development. Another downside is that some programs may contain inappropriate content
such
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 as violence, sexual content, or harmful
steriotypes
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stereotypes
 which can negatively impact
childrens
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children's
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 behaviour or worldview. In conclusion,
while
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television
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 can be an excellent
toll
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tool
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 for education and entertainment for
children
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, it
also
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 has potential drawbacks especially when consumed
exessively
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excessively
. To maximize the benefits, parents should monitor the content that their
children
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 watch and ensure
the
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a
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 healthy balance between screen
time
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 and other activities
Submitted by bahram.azizzade on

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task achievement
Ensure to articulate a fully integrated response and examination of both advantages and disadvantages, providing depth to each point.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to punctuation and spacing between words for clearer readability.
coherence cohesion
Strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the discussion.
task achievement
Effective discussion on both benefits and drawbacks, showing a balanced perspective.
task achievement
Good use of examples to support the points made, even though more could be added for even greater depth.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Educational programs
  • Cultural awareness
  • Attention span
  • Cognitive development
  • Screen time
  • Violence and aggression
  • Health implications
  • Social skills
  • Parent supervision
  • Academic performance
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