Holding International games such as The Olympic Games is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effects while other argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both sides of view and give your own opinion.

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Holding international
games
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such
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as The Olympic
Games
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is an interesting activity. Some individuals might think that
hold
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holding
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this
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event
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have
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has
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many advantages.
First,
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The
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Olypmic
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Olympic
Games
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can bring
positive
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a positive
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economic impact to the
host
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country
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because hosting international
games
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would attract
poeple
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people
from different
countires
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countries
for visiting
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to visit
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. It might need a lot of
staff
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stuff
show examples
to entertain them. So, the number of job requirements will increase which can boost the economy through tourism, infrastructure development and job creation.
Second,
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The
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Olypmic
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Olympic
Games
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can
also
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rise
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raise
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the
host
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country
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's global prestige and recognition. Since
this
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event
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is very important to the
host
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country
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, they will focus on developing the centre of the
country
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for
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to
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gain global attention to their advanced infrastructure.
Therefore
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,
this
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event
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can expand the international reputation
to
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of
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the
host
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country
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and encourage their cultural exchange.
In
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On
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contrary
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the contrary
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, holding The
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Olypmic
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Olympic
Games
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might damage the environment. Many visitors would come to visit the
host
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country
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for
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this
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these
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games
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. So, the construction and influx of visitors can lead to
enviroment
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environmental
degradation and
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an enanced
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enanced
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enhanced
enhance
carbon footprint, these would
destory
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destroy
the
enviroment
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environment
.
Moreover
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,
although
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the
host
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country
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can develop lots of
factilities
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facilities
activities
to
benefits
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benefit
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thier
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their
global prestige and recognition. Many buildings produced for the
games
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are often underutilized post-
event
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, leading to
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a wastage
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wastage
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waste
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of
resoures
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resources
and funds. In conclusion, having The
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Olypmic
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Olympic
Games
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have
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has
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both pros and cons.
This
Linking Words
event
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could boost the visitors, buildings, job creation and reputation
to
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of
show examples
the hosting
country
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.
However
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, because many
factilies
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facilities
families
factories
were built and attracted tourism, it would lead
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to the
show examples
the
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an
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increasing footprint and wastage of resources.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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task achievement
Your essay provided a balanced view of both sides, adequately addressing the task, but you could enhance your task response by incorporating more specific examples or statistics that support your arguments.
task achievement
Try to further develop your main points with more detailed explanations and specific examples that illustrate your views.
coherence cohesion
The essay's structure is generally logical, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, ensure each paragraph follows a logical progression to make your points clearer.
coherence cohesion
Linking between sections of the essay could be smoother. Use more advanced transitional phrases to improve the flow between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frames your discussion.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument, fulfilling the task requirements.
coherence cohesion
You identified several relevant points related to the economic impact and the potential environmental consequences of hosting the Olympic Games.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic impact
  • infrastructure development
  • global attention
  • international reputation
  • cultural exchange
  • national pride
  • sense of achievement
  • fund allocation
  • essential services
  • environmental degradation
  • carbon footprint
  • post-event utilization
  • resource wastage
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