Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words
In some
individuals
opinion, doctors and engineers have to stay in their hometown after finishing their studies Change noun form
individual's
individuals'
while
others believe that they can work in other countries as they wish. Although
there's always a vast disagreement, I will discuss both side's points of view in this
essay. First of all, professionals such
as doctors and engineers have tried so hard to achieve what they have today. long
hours of studying, lack of sleep and spending long hours in laboratories or hospitals are just small examples of the difficulties they all have been through. as a person who has experienced only four years of studying, I would contend that they must have the choice to live wherever their profession is valued enough. Capitalize word
Long
further
and even more importantly, as the educational system is improving all over the world, going to Rephrase
Furthermore
the
university is no longer a dream to the majority of people and more students tend to continue their studies. meanwhile, the healthcare system is not improving Correct article usage
apply
in
Change preposition
at
such
speed. so the number of graduates increases in a country while
there is
no proper work opportunities. Change the verb form
are
this
situation would leave them no other choice rather
than immigration. Admittedly, it is an undeniable fact that every community needs Correct your spelling
other
it's
own workforce in order to improve in different aspects. the existing problems in every society must be worked out in order to attract Replace the word
its
it's
own people and change their minds about leaving their land By way of conclusion, l once again reaffirm my position that every human being, Replace the word
its
weather
with professional skills or not, should feel free to work and live where they want. the governments are the ones to blame for the country's situation which leads to high rates of immigration after all.Correct your spelling
whether
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task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more comprehensively. Instead of listing several points briefly, choose a few and elaborate on them in depth. This will help enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This will improve the logical flow of your essay and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. Examples drawn from personal experience, statistical data, or real-world scenarios can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Conclude the essay by summarizing the main points discussed and reiterating your personal opinion. This will enhance the overall structure and provide a clear ending.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion by covering both sides of the argument, fulfilling the task requirement effectively.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion that frames the discussion, which is essential for a coherent essay structure.
task achievement
The essay shows an understanding of the topic and attempts to engage with the question in a thoughtful manner.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite