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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions
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The graph provides information on the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of the
population
Use synonyms
 in four Asian countries namely the Philippines, Malaysia,
Thailand
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, and Indonesia living in
Cities
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 from 1970 to 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is
clean
Correct your spelling
clear
show examples
 that Malaysia is at the top of the chart from other countries.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
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Thailand
Use synonyms
 has a lower the
percentage
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 of
population
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 living in
cities
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. In terms of the
population
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, Malaysia's
population
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 had 30% in the beginning, and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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 massively to around 84% in 2040. And Indonesia stood in second position.
This
Linking Words
 country will gradually rise from starting it had 12% in 1970
then
Linking Words
 slowly increase and reach nearly 62% in 2040. The
percentage
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 of Indonesia's peak is almost above 60. For the remaining
percentage
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 of the
population
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, The Philippines
population
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 lived in
cities
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approximately
Change preposition
at approximately
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 32% in the beginning
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 1970. The Philippines'
population
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 living in
cities
Use synonyms
 fluctuated many times.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it ultimately increases from 30% to nearly 55% in 2040.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Thailand
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's
population
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 was the lowest among the above countries. In 1970,
Thailand
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's
population
Use synonyms
had in
Verb problem
was
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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close
19
Change preposition
to 19
show examples
%.From next year it will increase by approximately 50% in the year 2040.
Submitted by mdtipusultanakhand on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population, thailand, cities with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • Asian countries
  • living in cities
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • introduction
  • overview
  • trend
  • body paragraph
  • compare
  • predicted percentages
  • summarize
  • closing statement
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