IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Write a letter of application to the orchestra. In the letter: - Introduce yourself and your instrument of choice - Explain how your credentials make you a good candidate - Express your enthusiasm for music

#application #orchestra #instrument #choice #credentials #candidate #enthusiasm #music
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Dear Sir/ Madam, I am writing
this
 letter to apply for a violinist role in your orchestra musical group. Your needs were made aware
to
Change preposition
of
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me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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when I came across your posting at the local community
center
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centre
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. My interest
for
Change preposition
in
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 violin grew in my final years of studying musical arts at the
university
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University
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 of Miami. I believe the following credentials will prove to be an asset for
this
 role. The Big Ben group awarded me the prestigious
musician
Capitalize word
Musician
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 of the
year
Capitalize word
Year
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 in 2019 for an outstanding performance. I have
also
traveled
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travelled
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 internationally with the former to study various instruments and how it compares to the local training. In the process, I have improved my skills to meet international standards. My enthusiasm for music is boundless and the above is a good example.
Although
violin
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the violin
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 is my
specialty
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speciality
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, I am interested in learning other instruments to be
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a substitute
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substitute
Fix the agreement mistake
substitutes
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 for other musicians during key performances. I hope my qualifications and skills will help you gauge my capability for
this
 role. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Vinod Selvaraju
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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task achievement
Consider expanding on specific experiences or performances that highlight your key experiences and achievements to enhance the Task Response score.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph explores a single idea for clarity and easy reading.
coherence cohesion
Clear logical structure with a well-organized response from introduction to closing.
coherence cohesion
Appropriate greeting and sign-off showcasing language proficiency and professional correspondence.
coherence cohesion
Note how each paragraph has its own focus: introduction, credentials, and enthusiasm.
task achievement
Comprehensive response with necessary information relevant to the requirements specified in the letter prompt.
task achievement
Professional and enthusiastic tone maintained throughout.
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