in some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Working hard is
one
Use synonyms
of the key factors in success and every person who has achieved success would agree with
this
Linking Words
.
However
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
feature might help you to become
one
Use synonyms
of the most successful people in the world, it could
also
Linking Words
lead to disaster. The most significant benefit of telling youth to try hard is to encourage them to find their goals and achieve them. Finding aims is
one
Use synonyms
of the challenges that anybody might encounter with it and because of that, advising the young generation to keep doing is of high importance. Another positive point that
this
Linking Words
action can affect is helping young ones to make a name for themselves in the future,
although
Linking Words
being well-known depends on a lot of different aspects.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, being a hard worker makes you do your best and don't think about the thoughts that may disturb you from your goals.
For instance
Linking Words
, there are a lot of people all over the world who are so talented but some distractions are always on the way to ruin your life.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
disadvantages to hearing to working hard at a young age.
One
Use synonyms
of the most serious drawbacks of it is suppressing the creativity of the child. Take,
for example
Linking Words
, having a background that working hard is the only way that ends in success could destroy the mindset and innovation. Even worse, when relatives tell you consistently to push yourself, the result might be
one
Use synonyms
thing: failure. Research has shown that the more pressure you put on a person, the higher the possibility of a defeat. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
working hard can benefit children, it
also
Linking Words
may ruin their lives.
Therefore
Linking Words
, parents or any advisors should be careful about what they say to children.
Submitted by mohamadhoseinvaeedi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the essay generally addresses the topic well, try to provide more detailed examples to support your points. More specific cases or studies can strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Ensure that every point made is directly relevant to the essay question and expands on it in a meaningful way. This will enhance your task response score.
coherence cohesion
Work on linking ideas more seamlessly from one paragraph to the next. This will improve the cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph deals with a distinct part of the argument, maintaining focus throughout, which helps in logically structuring the essay.
task achievement
The response covers both advantages and disadvantages of the message, addressing the task requirement adequately.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: