Medical professionals such as doctors or nurses from poorer countries often migrate to richer countries to work. What problems arise from this situation? What measures can be taken to deal with it?

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Medical
professional
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professionals
show examples
as one of the important
profession
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professions
show examples
is
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a contentious issue debate,
whereas
many of them move to
development
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developed
show examples
countries
in order to find lucrative jobs abroad.
This
essay will examine some
caused
Replace the word
causes
show examples
of the problem and give some potential solutions.
Overall
, there are some factors that can
consider
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be considered
show examples
into account why
doctors
and
nursess
Correct your spelling
nurses
leave their origin
countries
work
Add the particle
to work
show examples
abroad.
Firstly
, higher compensation. Salary could be one of the potential
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
why medical experts find a job across
countries
. Become a doctor or nurse is not
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
easy way, there are many things to
sucrifice
Correct your spelling
succeed
, being a
doctors
need
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high
intelegence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
, a lot of money, need more focus
during
Change preposition
on
show examples
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
, by
then
if medical experts
not
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are not
show examples
paid well in their origin country, they often looking for good opportunities align with their skills.
For example
, research by
Dr.
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Dr
show examples
Stinma mentioned that 68%
qualified
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of qualified
show examples
medical
profesionals
Correct your spelling
professionals
not
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are not
show examples
paid fairly in India, leading them to move
across
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apply
show examples
to
australia
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Australia
show examples
.
Furthermore
, sufficient equipment. Developing
countries
usually lack
of
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apply
show examples
technologies and
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
related to medical tools if
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to richer
countries
, leading to brain drain. Many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Doctors
Add a verb
Doctors are
Doctors were
show examples
eager to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
Doctors
, but
due to
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
of equipment in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
,
hence
they want to explore
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
richer
countries
.
However
,
this
issue can
be reduce
Change the verb form
be reduced
show examples
by
evolving
Verb problem
allowing
show examples
the government to take some actions. one of the
solution
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solutions
show examples
through make a
minimun
Correct your spelling
minimum
standard salary
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
medical
professions
Replace the word
professionals
show examples
. the other solution could be supporting and providing equipment
relate
Wrong verb form
related
show examples
to
medicals
Change the noun form
medical
show examples
tools and technology
Change preposition
in hospital
show examples
hospital
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hospitals
show examples
and
university
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universities
show examples
.
To conclude
, the gap
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
salaries and lack of
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
in developing
countries
could be some reasons to
motivated
Wrong verb form
motivate
show examples
medical experts
move
Fix the infinitive
to move
show examples
from their origin country to richer
countries
.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
this
issue can
handle
Wrong verb form
be handled
show examples
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
evolving the government and
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
some actions, like, increasing the salary and providing
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
tools
redarding
Correct your spelling
regarding
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
medical
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
.
Submitted by masry.pakpahan on

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Coherence & Cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, but the points in the body could be more logically connected to make the argument stronger. Try to connect the points in a more coherent manner to improve logical structure.
Task Achievement
There is a need for more detailed and specific examples to support your arguments. Work on incorporating detailed examples to strengthen your points.
Task Achievement
The ideas need to be clearly and comprehensively expressed. Avoid vague expressions and ensure each point is explained thoroughly.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good framework for the discussion.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both the causes and solutions for the migration of medical professionals.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Healthcare sector
  • Workload
  • Cultural barriers
  • Economic implications
  • Quality of care
  • Mortality rates
  • Incentivize
  • Remuneration
  • International agreements
  • Infrastructure
  • Underserved areas
  • Exchange programs
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