IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

image-preview The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

image-preview The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#image-preview #results #survey #people’s #coffee #tea #habits #five #australian #cities #summerise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart gives information about the proportion of dwellers in five
cities
such
 as
Sydney
,
Melbourne
, Brisbane, Adelaide, and Hobart in Australia who bought fresh or
instant
coffee
 and those who went to the
cafe
 for drinking in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 four weeks.
Overall
, it can be clearly seen that in
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
all
cities
, people prefer to go to a
cafe
 with the exception of Adelaide.
However
,
while
 the number of individuals who want
instant
coffee
 was significantly more than fresh
coffee
 in four
cities
, the difference is much lower in
Sydney
. The only
cities
 where the participation levels differ greatly between
cafe
 lovers and
instant
coffee
 lovers are
Sydney
 and
Melbourne
, which are far
popular
Correct quantifier usage
more popular
show examples
 with
cafe
 lovers (with
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 average of 63% as opposed to 46% in
Sydney
 and
Melbourne
),
although
 purchasing fresh
coffee
 is the least popular activity (roughly 42% in both
cities
).
On the other hand
, the difference between going to
cafe
Add an article
a cafe
the cafe
show examples
 and drinking
instant
coffee
 is reduced (with
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 average of 55% and 53% respectively) in
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three
cities
. Despite
this
, the average of people in these
cities
 who have a tendency to purchase fresh
coffee
 is much lower than
Sydney
Change preposition
in Sydney
show examples
 and
Melbourne
.
Submitted by mohamadhoseinvaeedi on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words cities, sydney, melbourne, instant, coffee, cafe with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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