The maps present changes that took place in grange park over a 124 years period between 1920 and 2024.

The maps present changes that took place in grange park over a 124 years period between 1920 and 2024.
The maps illustrate the process of industrialisation which occurred in Grange
Park
from 1920 to 2024 over a
124 years
Correct your spelling
124-year
period. In 1920,the
park
was a much greener area with a number of gardens and
pond
Correct article usage
a pond
show examples
for water
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
,but during the next 124
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
the town witnessed a number of dramatic changes. The most noticeable change is that
fountain
Correct article usage
the fountain
show examples
and ponds for water plants,which
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
in the north of the
park
,
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
been knocked down to make a way for
Rose
Correct article usage
the Rose
show examples
garden
Capitalize word
Garden
show examples
and children’s
play ground
Correct your spelling
playground
show examples
.
Moreover
, seats have
been sprang
Wrong verb form
sprung
show examples
up around the Rose Garden. Only
entrance
Correct article usage
the entrance
show examples
,which is located in the north of the
park
,has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
remained. The second biggest change is that
Rose
Correct article usage
the Rose
show examples
Garden and Glass
house
Capitalize word
House
show examples
have been turned into
cafe
Correct article usage
a cafe
show examples
and water feature.
Further
developments are the construction of
Correct article usage
an amphitheater
show examples
amphitheater
Change the spelling
amphitheatre
show examples
and seats. The only thing kept in
this
area
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
been entrance
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Eldon
street
Capitalize word
Street
show examples
.
Overall
,a comparison of the two maps reveals a change from largely green to mainly new buildings
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words park with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

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