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Writing Samples
Band 4

The advantages brought by the spread of English as a global language will outweigh the disdavantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the view

#spread #english #language #disdavantages
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English
 is familiar in our lives and spreading quickly as a global
language
.
This
 may lead to some
Benefits
 and
drawbacks
. But I believe that the
benefits
is outweigh
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
. Being a global
language
 may destroy some countries's conventional counterparts.
This
 is because
English
 tend to be a second
language
 in their countries.
This
 leads to their young generation depending on
English
instead
 of their mother tongue.
As a consequence
, laking traditional knowledge has continued.
For example
, in Germany, they wrote the business experience by their tongues
therefore
 if you want to read and learn
this
, you have to know their
language
. Moving to tremendous
benefits
.
English
 as a global
language
 can improve
the
Change the word
our
show examples
 ability to exaggerate our relationship.
This
 leads to a number of increasing chances to access more career opportunities and higher education.
For example
, those who have
English
 as their second
language
 are able to attain more salary, average of more than 30% compared to the normal in developing countries.
In addition
, the improving possibility of making friends and getting
marriage
Replace the word
married
show examples
 to a foreigner can help some isolated individuals reach a happy life.
To sum up
,
English
 as a global
language
 bring more
benefits
 from career opportunities to great relationships and
also
 brings some
drawbacks
. But the
drawbacks
 are small if compared to the
benefits
. I strongly support the advantages outweigh the disadvantages despite some
drawbacks
.
Submitted by reigondt on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, but the transition between ideas could be smoother. Consider using more linking words and structures to enhance the logical flow between and within paragraphs.
task achievement
To improve the task response, ensure that each point is fully developed and supported with relevant examples or data. Strengthen your arguments with more specific details and analysis.
language accuracy
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrases that can affect clarity. Try revising sentences for better readability.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion clearly state your opinion, which provides a solid foundation for your arguments.
task achievement
You have addressed both the benefits and drawbacks of English as a global language, showing a balanced view.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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