Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unneccessary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support
It
is often argue
that all Change the verb form
is often argued
of
Change preposition
apply
children
should spend leisure time with their families
whilst others disagree and think it is not positive for all children
. In this
essay
I am going to examine Add a comma
essay,
this
question from both point
of view and give my own opinion on the matter.
On the one hand, some Change to a plural noun
points
believes
that Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
spend
time with Wrong verb form
spending
families
is so valuable, specially
if Replace the word
especially
families
environment are
secure. Correct subject-verb agreement
is
children
can use their long time
experiences and their Correct your spelling
long-term
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
in
throughout Change preposition
apply
of
their Change preposition
apply
life
, for Fix the agreement mistake
lives
instant
, Living with Replace the word
instance
families
teach
offspring how to behave in society. Correct subject-verb agreement
teaches
Children
can learn how to loved
and care Wrong verb form
love
other
people in society by Change preposition
for other
see
love in their Change the verb form
seeing
families
and relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
in
family Change preposition
with
member
if their Fix the agreement mistake
members
families
have great bonding because family is best
circumstance to enhance Change the article
the best
emotional
aspect in Correct article usage
the emotional
children
.
On the other hand
, some individuals think oppositely their perspective are
that youngster ought to step out from Change the verb form
is
families
during their life
. Definitely living out of safe zoom
Capitalize word
Zoom
have
a lot Correct subject-verb agreement
has
meri
and Change preposition
of meri
demerit
for Correct subject-verb agreement
demerits
children
. On
of the most noticeable Correct your spelling
One
benefit
for Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
children
they gain independent
, Replace the word
independence
being
self-sufficient can learn Verb problem
become
in
live alone without Change preposition
to
Correct pronoun usage
their families
families
help. Change noun form
families'
family's
Other advantage
of living without Change the wording
Another advantage
Other advantages
families
causes
Verb problem
is that
children
could
extend their communication and make friends in their Wrong verb form
can
life
.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
obviously
parental guidance is vital for many Add a comma
obviously,
children
and Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
youngster
shouldn’t neglect Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
Change preposition
apply
to
Change preposition
apply
this
valuable property if they have it and also
living Change preposition
outside
out
of Change preposition
outside
Correct article usage
the family
family
circle could teach adolescents many Correct article usage
the family
life
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
skill
so Fix the agreement mistake
skills
children
should find balance
to manage Add an article
a balance
the balance
this
situation.Submitted by zahranajafi107 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
language use
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely. Consider incorporating synonyms and more complex expressions.
accuracy
Pay close attention to spelling and grammatical accuracy. Small errors can be distracting and may obscure the clarity of your arguments.
structure
Consider organizing your essay into clearer paragraphs with one main idea per paragraph, supported by specific examples or reasons. This will enhance the coherence and cohesion of your text.
development
Be sure to develop your ideas fully. While you've touched on important points, expanding on these with more detailed examples or explanations could strengthen your argument.
introduction
You effectively introduced the topic and presented a clear thesis statement, outlining the essay's direction.
task response
Your essay addresses both sides of the argument, showing an understanding of the task requirements.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint and the reasons behind it, reinforcing your position.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.