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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweigh is increasing. What are the causes and solutions of this problem.

#people #risk #health #overweigh
Nowadays, it is reported that the recorded cases of overweight, which is categorized as a severe health issue, are growing lately. There are numerous causes of these problems; improper eating habits and too much exposure to psychological
stress
. In
this
 essay, I will explain
this
further
as well as
 provide the appropriate solutions.
Initially
, most of the
people
 do not have a healthy diet in their daily lives.
This
 means that they do not really care about the portion, the variety of the foods they consume, and the ideal time of their eating.
This
 will inhibit their body from producing a well-balanced nutrition and badly influence their metabolism,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which, leads to unstable fat proportion in their body.
Secondly
, repetitive feelings of
stress
 may drive
people
 to engage in more frequent eating behaviour, as it is one of the mechanisms to cope with
stress
.
For
this
 reason, there are two ways to solve
this
 problem.
Firstly
,
people
 should be selective with their diet
as well as
 organise their daily eating plan. They can restrict various foods that contain high levels of fat, and increase protein-rich consumption.
Furthermore
, they need to settle
a
Change preposition
on a
show examples
number of suitable methods to endure
stress
 and continue their life adaptively.
For instance
,
people
 can find new hobbies
such
 as engaging in sports activities, learning how to cook, hanging out with old friends, and other ways that help them go through tough times. In summary, because being overweight is mostly caused by a lack of a balanced diet and continuous
stress
 in life,
hence
people
 should regulate their food consumption better and find several ways to overcome
stress
.
Submitted by 000silr111 on

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specific examples
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mentioning specific types of food or psychological stressors might help solidify your argument.
cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to maintain a logical flow throughout the essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have mentioned that stress leads to more frequent eating but it might be useful to introduce the term 'emotional eating' for clarity and precision.
introduction
The introduction clearly sets up the topic and purpose of the essay.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the key points and provides a clear solution.
task achievement
There is a consistent effort to address both causes and solutions of the problem, showing an understanding of the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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