Some people believe that all children should have a pet or an animal to look after. Other people disagree, however, saying that this depends on a child’s circumstances. Consider these opposing view and give your on opinion.

It is often said that
children
benefit from caring for domestic animals, especially in today’s
technology- focussed
Correct your spelling
technology-focused
show examples
world.
However
, the issue is not entirely straightforward, and arguments can
also
be made against the idea.
This
essay will discuss the debate, and give a concluding view. On the one hand, those who support the ownership of
pets
cite the various benefits that the activity can bring to a child. These range from understanding nutrition
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
to learning about biology and daily routines.
For example
, food selection and exercise activities contribute to
this
strand of development, which adds greatly to a child’s all-round education. Another argument is the emotional support that
children
receive from
pets
, meaning that the child feels more secure and
thus
more confident.
By contrast
, opponents of
this
view point out that not all
children
live in a situation where
pet
keeping is advisable, or even possible. Examples can be seen in less affluent countries, where the expense of maintaining a
pet
may be prohibitive.
In addition
, many
children
live in unstable family environments,
due to
such
issues as unemployment or political turbulence. For these families,
pets
would probably suffer neglect, meaning that it would be unfair to keep them, or possibly even dangerous.
Finally
, it must be said that not all young people actually want to keep a
pet
, because their interests lie
elsewhere
. For these youngsters, animal ownership should not be encouraged.
Overall
, it seems advisable that the decision to keep a
pet
should be based on a child’s interest, ability and family circumstances, rather than on a general view that ‘all
children
’ should have animals. It would appear that
this
serves the interests of both the
children
and the
pets
involved.
Submitted by kirankhosa681 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to support your points, especially when mentioning economic conditions or specific family situations.
coherence cohesion
While the essay maintains a good structure, try to enhance transitions between paragraphs to ensure the flow of ideas is smoother.
task achievement
The essay provides a well-balanced discussion of both views regarding children's involvement with pets.
coherence cohesion
Clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion, making the essay easy to follow and logical.
task achievement
Main points are well-supported with relevant arguments, showing a deep understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: