Some people seek a lot of advice from family and friends when choosing their career. Others feel it is better to choose a career more independently. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
When choosing a
future
career, people generally tend to either consult those they are close to or make the choice themselves. Whilst both paths are equally valid, I am of firm belief that every person
should decide on their own future
without intervention, as their life is constructed of choices they make, as well as
their deeds.
Firstly
, whatever career a person
opts for is going to be their main field of study in the foreseeable future
, meaning that if a wrong choice is made under pressure a person
is likely to be unhappy long term. For instance
, a friend of mine has succumbed to her father’s will and is now studying Journalism, which she has no interest in. Having to engage in Journalism related
activities makes her miserable Correct your spelling
Journalism-related
due to
her true interest being Linguistics.
Secondly
, peer and parental pressure is oftentimes difficult to cope with. Not every person
can find it in them to change their career after graduation from a higher education establishment. That may result in never finding out the extent of their potential in an area they are enthusiastic about. My mother can serve as an example of such
a circumstance. Her childhood dream was to become a veterinarian, yet she was advised at first and forced by her parents later to enroll
in engineering. At Change the spelling
enrol
this
point in time
she is 44 years old and is still pondering the thought of whether she would do good in the medical field or not. Both these examples highlight how a choice made under outsiders’ authority was the wrong one.
In conclusion, Add a comma
time,
while
for some it may be fruitful to seek advice from their loved ones, friends and family alike, the final decision should be made independently in order to avoid getting into a situation that can lead to misery and regret in the future
.Submitted by khotkina.ma on
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task achievement
Expand on your arguments with more detailed explanations or additional examples. This will enhance the depth of the analysis, making your essay more robust.
task achievement
Try to link the examples more clearly to the main argument. This will enhance the integration of examples into your analysis.
coherence cohesion
You could use transitional phrases more consistently to enhance the flow of your essay. This will improve the overall coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction that states your position clearly and a conclusion that effectively summarizes the main points.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples that support your argument, making your position more convincing.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas is maintained throughout the essay, allowing the reader to easily follow your argument.