Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays, socializing through online platforms, especially social media, has become increasingly common. I believe that

this

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trend is a negative development as it leads to reduced face-to-face interactions and prevents

people

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from being fully present in their social engagements. One reason why online communication is problematic is that

people

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tend to interact only with

others

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who share similar interests or backgrounds.

This

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creates social bubbles, limiting exposure to diverse perspectives. When

people

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engage primarily with those who have the same viewpoints, they may become less empathetic toward individuals with different experiences.

For example

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, a group of individuals with a background in technology might dismiss the value of fields like literature or art, leading to a narrow-minded view of society.

In contrast

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, in-person interactions offer opportunities to connect with

people

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from various walks of life, fostering greater understanding and empathy. Another drawback of online socializing is that it often prevents individuals from being fully engaged in the conversation. When we communicate online, we only see what

others

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choose to share, which may not reflect their true circumstances.

Furthermore

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, many

people

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curate their social media profiles to highlight only their successes, creating unrealistic portrayals of their lives.

This

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can lead to unhealthy comparisons and feelings of inadequacy among

others

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For instance

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, platforms like Instagram are frequently used to showcase personal achievements, which can make

others

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feel insecure or dissatisfied with their own lives. In conclusion,

while

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online interactions can offer convenience, the negative consequences,

such

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as reduced social engagement and the creation of social bubbles, outweigh the benefits.

Therefore

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, relying too heavily on online communication for socializing may lead to more harm than good.

ru.kabiru.biruThu Oct 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph effectively transitions from one idea to the next to maintain a smooth flow of ideas.

task achievement

Include some counterarguments to provide a more balanced perspective. This will strengthen the task achievement score.

supported main points

The essay provides well-developed main points that are supported with relevant examples.

introduction conclusion present

There is a clear introduction and conclusion, which aid in presenting a well-structured argument.

complete response

The response stays focused on the question and answers it comprehensively.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

social media platforms
online interactions
virtual communication
global community
interpersonal skills
digital divide
cyberspace
virtual presence
social networking
mental wellbeing
digital literacy
safe spaces
marginalized groups
face-to-face communication
socialisation

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Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crimes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?