We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In today’s interconnected world, the idea that we should focus solely on supporting our own

communities

Use synonyms

and countries is frequently debated.

While

Linking Words

it is essential to address local issues, I believe we cannot ignore global responsibilities, as challenges like poverty, climate change, and diseases transcend borders. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with the statement, as our world’s growing interconnectedness necessitates a broader approach to aid. It is my view that providing help beyond our own

communities

Use synonyms

has numerous benefits for everyone involved. By extending support internationally, we contribute to global security,

economic

Correct word choice

and economic

show examples

stability, and foster diplomatic relations.

For instance

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, countries that contribute aid and assistance to poverty-stricken areas help reduce migration pressures and potential conflicts, which, in turn, contributes to a more stable world.

Additionally

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, wealthier nations have both resources and expertise that can address global challenges effectively,

such

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as developing vaccines or supporting sustainable practices to counter climate change. Not using these resources globally represents a missed opportunity to make a significant impact where it’s most needed.

In contrast

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, some people claim that we should focus on supporting our own

communities

Use synonyms

to strengthen them before looking outward. They firmly insist that addressing local needs first will build a robust foundation for a country’s growth and ensure that its citizens are well taken care of.

However

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, I do not find

this

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argument convincing, as focusing only locally could lead to isolationism and hinder global progress.

While

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building strong

communities

Use synonyms

is indeed essential, completely overlooking international needs ignores the moral obligation we hold toward humanity.

Furthermore

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, in some cases, excessive local support could even create dependency, failing to encourage sustainable growth in regions that would benefit from international cooperation. In conclusion, I completely disagree with the notion that we should limit our concerns to our own

communities

Use synonyms

and countries. Global issues require collaborative solutions, and by addressing international needs, we foster collective security, economic stability, and ethical growth.

Although

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local needs are important, our interconnected world demands that we extend help beyond borders for a more sustainable and harmonious future.

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Coherence and Cohesion

While your ideas are well-structured and presented, consider introducing more varied sentence structures to enhance the flow. This will not only elevate the readability but also demonstrate higher proficiency in writing.

Task Achievement

Incorporate a more balanced view acknowledging the merits of focusing on local needs before transitioning to global concerns. This will provide a fuller picture of the debate and showcase analytical depth.

Coherence and Cohesion

Excellent introduction and conclusion, both succinctly framing the argument and reiterating key points.

Task Achievement

You provide a well-rounded argument with valid reasoning and examples, clearly supporting your disagreement with the statement.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

340 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global interconnectivity
international cooperation
ethics
moral obligation
geographical borders
diplomatic relations
economic stability
global security
resource allocation
expertise
international aid
dependency and development
sustainable solutions
local and global initiatives
community resilience

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We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports or musician. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Some people think that the government should invest more in public health and less in other areas such as education and infrastructure. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With a fast spec of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

The number of old people is increasing in many countries. Some people think this causes problems, whilst other people think that old people have an important role to play. How far do you agree or disagree