Globalization is creating a world with a single culture and destroying national identity in the process. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Steve no copyright)

In today's
world
, each nation has a closer connection to one another owning to the advancing development of the society, creating a concept called
globalization
. Meanwhile,
this
phenomenon may result in a single culture situation and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lead to a devastation of national identity. In my opinion, I don't agree with
this
speculation as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
globalization
tends to make individuals more cooperative.
The
Correct article usage
Globalization
show examples
globalization
boosts the relationship between states to states
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and
also
eliminates the
conflits
Correct your spelling
conflict
conflicts
between each country. In terms of finance,
the
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apply
show examples
international
trades
Fix the agreement mistake
trade
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has become a link between countries
throught
Correct your spelling
through
throughout
their product
import
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imports
show examples
and
export
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exports
show examples
.
This
is a global cooperation for gaining the highest profit for the whole society.
Furthermore
,
the
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apply
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globalization
encourages
people
to learn
different
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about different
show examples
cultures
, which enables
people
to widen their understanding of the diverse races, potentially diminishing the misunderstanding of cultural differences.
Addtionally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
,
the
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globalization
allows
people
from different countries to help each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
, making the
world
more cooperative.
As a result
,
the
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apply
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globalization
opens a platform for
people
to interact and helps establish a common standard for everyone.
Globalization
is dedicated to
bring
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bringing
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people
closer but not
unify
Wrong verb form
unifying
show examples
everyone's cultural identity.
While
people
has
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have
show examples
a greater understanding
for
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of
show examples
each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
, the
world
will be more peaceful. As some
people
might be worried about their loss of national identity, they could
however
learn to present their own
cultures
.
As a result
, more
cultures
could be seen and understood, which is a beneficial asset for the collective good.
Also
,
people
don't need to abandon their own culture.
On the other hand
, they could learn how to present their cultural values. With the help of
globalization
, In conclusion, I believe
the
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apply
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globalization
does not make
cultures
unified.
Instead
, it has
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
influence
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
making
this
world
better.
Submitted by a0979181071 on

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task achievement
Provide specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, mention specific instances where globalization has enhanced cultural exchange without erasing national identities.
coherence and cohesion
Organize paragraphs to clearly separate ideas and ensure each paragraph addresses one main point. This will enhance clarity and flow.
general linguistic accuracy
Ensure to correct minor grammatical errors and typos such as 'addtionally' to 'additionally', 'throught' to 'through', and 'conflics' to 'conflicts'.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear stance on the topic, arguing against the idea that globalization destroys national identity.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion clearly articulate the main argument, providing a strong framework for the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Complex ideas are expressed, showing a good command of language and the ability to engage with the topic critically.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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