Many criminals commit more crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?
There is no doubt, that many former prisoners break the law after
them
Change the pronoun
they
are being release
. Change the verb form
are being released
are releasing
This
essay will explore reasons
Correct article usage
the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
this
trend as well as
elaborate the
Change preposition
on the
mesures
which could tackle Correct your spelling
measures
with
Change preposition
apply
this
problem.
As for causes of this
phenomenon, the bad influence of a prison and the difficulties in finding a job
for ex-prisoner,
will be considered. Remove the comma
apply
Firstly
, correction institutions keep behaind
the bar killers, Correct your spelling
behind
robberists
, and scammers. Staying in Correct your spelling
robbers
robberies
this
environment, an imprisoner may start to copy such
destractive
manners, increasing the Correct your spelling
destructive
distractive
possibilty
Correct your spelling
possibility
to break
Change preposition
of breaking
law
in the future. Add an article
the law
Secondly
, many employers reluctantly hire former prisoners without good
education because managers do not want to Add an article
a good
have
risks with "spoiled Verb problem
take
apple
", as they think. Fix the agreement mistake
apples
As a result
, more than 90% of released individuals can not find a job
, need money, and commite
crimes.
Regarding Correct your spelling
commit
to
solutions against Remove the preposition
apply
the
returning to crimes after going through the correctional system, Correct article usage
apply
the
isolation in prison and getting Correct article usage
apply
education
may alter the current situation. In order to deprive a prisoner Add an article
an education
from
the negative influence of cellmates should be organized Change the preposition
of
the
complete exclusion Correct article usage
apply
Change preposition
of contacts
contacts
with other prisoners. Fix the agreement mistake
contact
Furthermore
, an individual in sentence
will communicate only with Add an article
a sentence
the sentence
artifitial intellegence
, which will help him to achieve a diploma . So, the educated graduates of Correct your spelling
artificial intelligence
Correct article usage
the corectional
corectional
system will easily find a Correct your spelling
correctional
job
and will not commite
Correct your spelling
commit
crime
again.
In conclusion, there are two main reasons Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
of
coming back to crimes after completing a jail Change preposition
for
sentense
. The Correct your spelling
sentence
accompany
Correct your spelling
company
with
Change preposition
by
dangerouse
neighbors and Correct your spelling
dangerous
abcentce
of paid Correct your spelling
absence
job
for realised people may be illuminated by restriction of Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
contacts
with other imprisoners and by usage Fix the agreement mistake
contact
artificial
Change preposition
of artificial
intellegence
, which will help to get enough knowledge to find a Correct your spelling
intelligence
job
.Submitted by sergeybelov83 on
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Task Achievement
Focus on improving grammatical accuracy and vocabulary to ensure clarity and precision in your ideas. For example, check subject-verb agreement, use of articles, and verb tenses.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use transitions and linking words more effectively to ensure smoother flow between ideas. This will help in maintaining coherence and a logical progression of arguments.
Introduction
The essay has a clear introduction outlining the topic and purpose.
Conclusion
Provides a conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed, which is a strength in maintaining coherence.
Task Achievement
Raises valid points about the influence of the prison environment and employment challenges, showing good understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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