A person's worth nowadays seems to judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned value, such as honour, kindness, and trust no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
consider that the better way arg find
these
Change the determiner
this news
show examples
news
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
from the
newspapers
.
However
,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
argue that social
media
is the best exporter for tidings. In my opinion, I believe that both views are equally important. On the one hand, it is believed
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
people
that
getting
Verb problem
apply
show examples
good information and reliable
news
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can
find
Wrong verb form
be found
show examples
from the quotidian. In fact
newspapers
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
encourage the person to be more
focusing
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
with
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
news
. A Study published
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
New York
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
concluded that 90% of those who buy
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
newspaper every day are more clever and amused with reading
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
.
As a result
, having
newspapers
can increase the person the reading
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
of the
People
individual.
on the other hand
, other
people
argue that
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of
media
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
necessary to get the best method of
news
. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other words, A Social network helps the worker and the job owner to read the latest
news
in the
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
by
search
Wrong verb form
searching
show examples
on the
news
channel . In fact, reading the good
tiding’s
Change noun form
tidings
show examples
on
website
Add an article
the website
show examples
can save
a-lot
Correct your spelling
a lot
show examples
of time .
For example
, my elder brother is a teacher and has less time to read the whole tidings So he rarely
read
Wrong verb form
reads
show examples
and
coming
Wrong verb form
comes
show examples
up with the world trends ,
while
my dad used to watch the
trend
Change the verb form
trending
show examples
news
from the f YouTube Channel
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
his office.
As a result
, It is believed by some
people
that the best to find trend
news
is
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
Add an article
the newspaper
a newspaper
show examples
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
,
while
others disagree and say that the
media
Change noun form
media's
show examples
basic requirement for the
news
. In my opinion, I believe that there is no single way to get a perfect source of
news
. Having
newspapers
along side
Correct your spelling
alongside
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
social
media
guarantee
Change the verb form
guarantees
show examples
you
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best
news
around the
global
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
world.
Submitted by 13788542 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Make sure each paragraph offers a complete idea that contributes to answering the question.
coherence cohesion
Work on paragraph organization to improve flow. Ensure each paragraph logically follows the previous one, and consider using linking words to connect ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help strengthen your response and demonstrate your understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your essay presents different viewpoints and maintains a balanced perspective, which shows a solid approach to task achievement.
coherence cohesion
You have included both an introduction and a conclusion, giving your essay a clear beginning and end.
task achievement
The attempt to include examples, such as mentioning your brother and father, helps illustrate your points and makes the essay more relatable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: