Some feel governments should invest primarily in educating the young, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is argued that

governments

Use synonyms

should prioritize investing in

youth

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education

Use synonyms

while

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others think that there are more pressing areas where resources should be allocated.

Although

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investing in

youth

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education

Use synonyms

brings long-term benefits, I believe that other sectors,

such

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healthcare

Use synonyms

, require more immediate attention. Some would argue that government investment in

youth

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education

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would significantly benefit the country by producing skilled professionals

such

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as engineers, doctors, and teachers.

This

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is to say that a well-educated workforce can drive innovation, economic growth, and

overall

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national prosperity.

For instance

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, Finland prioritizes

youth

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education

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, and

as a result

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, it boasts one of the highest literacy rates in the world, contributing to its strong economy.

However

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while

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education

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is undeniably important, I believe that

healthcare

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should be given greater priority, as a healthy population is essential for sustaining long-term national development.

Governments

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should prioritize urgent issues like public

healthcare

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, as is a pressing concern.

This

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is because

well-functioning

Correct article usage

a well-functioning

show examples

healthcare

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system ensures that citizens receive timely medical treatment.

However

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, in many countries, long hospital wait times pose a major challenge.

For instance

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, in Canada, patients often wait for 3-4 months just to see a doctor, which is unacceptable for those who have urgent medical conditions.

Therefore

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, I think that addressing

healthcare

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challenges should be a top priority for

governments

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to ensure timely medical attention for all citizens. In conclusion,

while

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youth

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education

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plays a crucial role in

country’s

Correct article usage

the country’s

show examples

long-term development, I believe that

governments

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should prioritize more urgent issues like

healthcare

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. After all, a nation’s prosperity ultimately depends on the health of its people.

sakshisyalSun Oct 27 2024

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Task Achievement

While your essay presents a clear opinion, make sure to address both views more equally. Try to define each side more explicitly before stating your own view.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a good logical structure, but ensure that each paragraph flows seamlessly into the next. For example, you can use transition words to help guide the reader.

Task Achievement

The examples you provide are relevant, but a few more specific details or statistics could strengthen your points, especially regarding the importance of education.

Structure

Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your main point.

Content

You have presented relevant examples that help underline your perspectives on both education and healthcare.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Some feel governments should invest primarily in educating the young, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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