The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pictures below depict the process of manufacturing
sugar
from the
sugar
cane.
Overall
, the whole operation consists of seven procedures which will be fully described in the following from growing the plant to drying and cooling to produce the
sugar
. To commence,
sugar
canes are grown and nourished within 12 to 18 months which are
then
harvested either by harvesting vehicles or manpower. Normally, harvesting by mankind would be more time-consuming.
Then
, the harvested
sugar
canes are crushed in a specific machine with a pair of wheels spinning which produces the
a
Correct article usage
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sugary juice.
In addition
, a funnel-shaped limestone filter is used to purify the liquid. The filtrates are
then
evaporated into syrup by continuous heating in a giant jar. After that, the heated syrup undergoes centrifugation that isolates the
sugar
crystals from the syrup.
Finally
, the separated
sugar
crystals
is
Unnecessary verb
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are put into a tank for drying and cooling and
turns
Verb problem
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to turn
them
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into
the
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edible
sugar
which is well-packed and is
assessable
Replace the word
accessible and
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distributed not only in supermarkets but
also
in the
storks
Fix the agreement mistake
stork
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stores.
Submitted by chchutah on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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