Some universty students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#universty #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some

university

Use synonyms

students want to study extra courses

in addition

Linking Words

to their main subjects, but others argue they need to focus on those compulsory ones and get higher marks. These two ideas can lead to advantages and disadvantages both to your own knowledge and experiences and what you want to do in the

future

Use synonyms

. On the one hand, many

people

Use synonyms

who go to a

university

Use synonyms

may learn subjects that are apart from their main course. It can be

due to

Linking Words

different reasons.

Firstly

Linking Words

, they may want to expand their knowledge and get more experience attending lectures from some experts in a specific industry,

for instance

Linking Words

This

Linking Words

can permit you to get an earlier understanding of what you really like and what you like to do in the

future

Use synonyms

in addition

Linking Words

to what you will face in the

future

Use synonyms

work industry.

Secondly

Linking Words

, students may choose other activities as their hobbies,

such

Linking Words

as courses about painting, playing some musical instrument or doing some sports. These courses could make them relaxing and less stressful after the hard work in college.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are

people

Use synonyms

who believe you need to study fully in the

university

Use synonyms

to get the highest mark. In my opinion, I disagree with

this

Linking Words

view. It is true that when

people

Use synonyms

are in school, might study a lot to reach higher scores to enter a prestigious

university

Use synonyms

in the

future

Use synonyms

. In college, it is important to learn and understand what are you studying and reflect on it in your

future

Use synonyms

work. In conclusion, whether students choose or not another subject other than the compulsory one, is based on one's personal preference.

However

Linking Words

I believe that

university

Use synonyms

life can allow you to discover the world and you can learn so much from

people

Use synonyms

around you, so do not focus only on getting better scores in your exams.

Submitted by rachel131 on Sat Nov 18 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay contains some grammatical issues that affect the clarity of your ideas. You should work on constructing sentences that are grammatically accurate and convey your points effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion

Make sure the introduction of your essay is clear and introduces the topic effectively; a concise thesis statement is essential.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use a wider range of linking devices to improve the progression of ideas from one sentence to another. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay.

Task Achievement

For task achievement, you should try to cover all parts of the prompt equally. Work on providing a more balanced discussion of the two views before stating your opinion.

Task Achievement

Try to include more specific examples to substantiate your points. Examples help illustrate and strengthen your arguments.

Task Achievement

Be cautious not to digress from the topic. All ideas expressed in the essay should be relevant to the questions asked in the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadventages?
In modern days, most knowledgeable individuals think that it is important for children to start studying a non-native language at initial schooling rather than after primary education. In my opinion, I strongly agree that learning other than a mother tongue as a new language is key to understanding in the initial stage of child growth. However, it could also be beneficial to use it more frequent basis to mitigate the total loss of the child's knowledge about it.
9
band
It is widely believed that children of different levels of intelligence should be taught together, while others think that more intelligent children should be taught separately. Discuss and present your opinion.
Whether young learners should be divided into different learning groups according to their academic grades has always been hotly debated. As some maintain that smart kids need to be grouped together, the majority, me included, believe that in providing equal resources, mixed classes may not be the most effective but the most necessary.
6
band
more and more people want to move to big cities. why is that ? what extent is the good trend?
Moving to a large urban centre to have a lucrative career is becoming popular in the world. Although overpopulation can be caused by transferring to the metropolitan areas, the economy of centre will be raised rapidly.
7.5
band
after Completing High School and Before Going to College or university, some students take a year off either to work or travel. What do you think is better – travelling or working. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches.
Some youths, before going to university or college just after their high school courses, consider a year for adventure or occupation. While there are some drawbacks associated with this measure, I believe the main benefits are more substantial as they can achieve some experience.
7.5
band
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages.
Living longer than the expected average life span is increasing gradually than earlier. Few argue that it is beneficial to the younger generation in many ways, while others oppose it stating this might be a burden or problematic to the government. This essay will discuss the pros and cons of this aging population and I believe this is more advantageous compared to the cons.

Some universty students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadventages?

It is widely believed that children of different levels of intelligence should be taught together, while others think that more intelligent children should be taught separately. Discuss and present your opinion.

more and more people want to move to big cities. why is that ? what extent is the good trend?

after Completing High School and Before Going to College or university, some students take a year off either to work or travel. What do you think is better – travelling or working. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches.