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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people use social media every day to get in touch with others and news events. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

#people #media #touch #news #events #outweigh
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It is argued that the advantages of using social
media
 every day to communicate with others or to read news outweigh the disadvantages. I disagree with that extent because the intensive usage of social
media
 could take a great amount of
time
 and
additionally
 increase your anxiety and stress levels. Many
people
 use social
media
 every day to talk to their friends or to permanently update a newsfeed.
Such
 activity tends to consume an enormous amount of
time
,
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 because
such
media
 services were designed to motivate users to spend more and more
time
 using them
,
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 since the advertisements are an integral part of their ecosystem and the main source of income. A lot of applications whose goal is to limit screen
time
,
such
 as ScreenTime Control or LimitYourScreen, could be considered as
a
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proof of the fact that
such
 a problem is well-known and widely discussed. Surely, to stay in touch with other
people
 is necessary for a person,
as well as
 to know what is happening around them, but the use of social
media
 should be decreased to avoid
time
 wasting.
In addition
 to the issue of
time
-consuming,
such
 attraction to the newsfeed could be the reason for high levels of stress and anxiety. Because of mental involvement in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 great number of negative events all over the world, a person might feel
the
Correct article usage
a
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 rising level of restlessness and tension.
Such
 applications as Twitter and Facebook provide convenient feeds containing news, opinions or forecasts for future events, and it is believed that most of them are negative.
Additionally
to
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that
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, some recent studies about the use of social
media
 tell about the new trend, so-called "Doom-scrolling", which means that being aware of dangerous accidents or prediction of
such
, forces
people
 to update the news in their applications every 2-3 minutes. In conclusion, despite social
media
 allowing
people
 to connect to each other and to know about the surrounding world and events, I think that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages in that case. The main arguments for that are significant
time
-consuming and unnecessary levels of stress and anxiety.
Submitted by batashevge on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that aligns with your thesis.
task achievement
Ensure that you directly address whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages throughout your essay.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly presents your stance on the topic.
supported main points
You provide relevant examples and studies to support your points.
logical structure
Each paragraph focuses on a distinct point, contributing to a logical structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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