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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In some countries, it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #children #education #four #years #school #seven #eight
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Every child in the world has the right to be educated. Some countries believe that school education should start at
age
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 four,
while
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 others allow
children
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 to start at seven or eight, which I consider too late for the following reasons. Scientifically, it is well known that
children
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’s cognitive abilities are at their peak during the first few years, especially from
age
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 four. Interestingly, recent research has revealed that a four-year-old child can learn more than two languages.
Additionally
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, psychologists state that it is easier for parents to guide and educate their
children
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 in these early years. Enrolling
children
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 in school as early as possible is
also
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 highly recommended, as it can help them learn to form relationships more naturally and effectively.
On the other hand
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, delaying education until the
age
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 of seven or eight can lead to a loss of
this
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 “golden period” of learning. At
this
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age
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,
children
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 often find it harder to absorb new information.
Moreover
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, learning new languages and skills may take longer, and joining other
children
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 in class can be more challenging than if they had started earlier.
To sum up
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, I firmly believe that
age
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 four is a valuable time
to begin
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 investing in
children
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’s education. Governments should work to increase awareness of
children
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’s cognitive abilities in these early years to ensure optimal learning outcomes.
Submitted by silvertran05 on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is well structured, consider using transitional phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.
introduction conclusion present
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument well.
supported main points
Your main points are generally supported with logical reasoning.
complete response
The essay tackles the task effectively, offering a complete response to the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • formal education
  • advisable
  • structured learning
  • academic skills
  • socialization
  • competitive edge
  • cognitive development
  • language acquisition
  • play-based learning
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • cognitive abilities
  • reduce stress
  • childhood
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