“In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. Do you agree or disagree?” Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years, going on a trip on holiday , especially in their own country has become more widespread among people.
However
, I acknowledge that, travelling in their own country. but I disagree with the notion that In the future, not
travel
abroad on holiday. In
this
essay, I will examine
this
perspective, and I will argue that travelling has indeed brought some challenges. To commence with, one argument against
travel
abroad hinges on the perception that the widespread travelling abroad on holiday has inflicted considerable damage on society.
Moreover
, there are compelling arguments in favour of the view that travelling abroad is very important because it has a variety of aspects including culture shift and learning different skills , especially architecture.
For instance
, I went to Paris in France
last
year 3 times for a computer course and looking different architecture , particularly Efiel Town.
However
, it is important to concede that extensive travelling abroad has led to significantly high costs. In conclusion,
while
excessive
travel
abroad has brought certain challenges in social communications, I believe that
travel
abroad can be far more beneficial.
Therefore
, the government should implement some policies to enhance the positive effect of
travel
, especially the abroad process.
Submitted by jingelbing on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Clarify and develop your argument for why you disagree with the statement. It’s not clear what your main stance is about traveling domestically versus abroad.
task achievement
The support for your ideas could be more detailed. Aim to provide concrete examples or evidence to back up each point.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures to make the essay more engaging and dynamic.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader to follow your main arguments.
task achievement
Your essay covers both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: