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Band 4.5

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
In
a
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an
show examples
advance
Replace the word
advanced
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techology
Correct your spelling
technology
 generation,
people
 acquire
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
 from everywhere
cost
Wrong verb form
costs
show examples
 less
time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays,but they are not allowed to use these,I still think it is not free in our society and not below
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everyone.
People
 who think to get other
people
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
 are easy and free to complete their
acheivement
Correct your spelling
achievement
.Take,
for example
,those who try to solve the question and want to
cost
Verb problem
spend
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 less
time
,they
saves
Change the verb form
save
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 large of
time
to find
Change preposition
by finding
show examples
 many ways,tests and
check
Wrong verb form
checking
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 whether is
worng
Correct your spelling
wrong
 or right.It is
convient
Correct your spelling
convenient
 and free.
However
,I do not think they may work out
fastily
Correct your spelling
fast
 because they are impossible to
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
 can find
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
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.
People
 will not
devolp
Correct your spelling
develop
the
Change the word
their
show examples
peronal
Correct your spelling
personal
 thinking
beacause
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because
 they do not get
reward
Correct article usage
a reward
show examples
 and
not
Add a missing verb
do not
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 have any activity.
On the other hand
,argue that
indiviual
Correct your spelling
individual
individuals
creative
Replace the word
creativity
show examples
 is important because it is valuable to
sale
Replace the word
sell
show examples
 other
people
.Creativers use
thier
Correct your spelling
their
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
 to make
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
different
innovation
Fix the agreement mistake
innovations
show examples
,
some
Correct word choice
and some
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people
such
 as famous company
boss
Fix the agreement mistake
bosses
show examples
 pay
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
 price to use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
 will have a lot of motivations to do
these
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
.
Consistily
Correct your spelling
Consistently
,
people
 understand
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
 thinking by themselves can earn more money and more value in the world,they will improve
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 skill and society develop
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better.I agree with
this
 argument because if
people
 spend a lot of
time
to make
Verb problem
doing
show examples
 things
such
 as scientific research, business and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
show examples
,they have to get some reward when they give the information to other
people
.
Otherwise
,
people
 do not create
just
Correct word choice
but just
show examples
 acquire something from
everyplace
Correct your spelling
every place
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
imformation
Correct your spelling
information
 nowadays is fast.It is some
people
 spend
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
time
to make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
Correct article usage
a speical
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speical
Correct your spelling
special
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 and
happen
Correct subject-verb agreement
happens
show examples
 in
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 mind.
Therefore
.
it is
Verb problem
It
show examples
 can not
share
Wrong verb form
be shared
show examples
 to be free in my
veiw
Correct your spelling
view
.
Submitted by a0953957266 on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, consider giving more balanced views on both sides of the argument before concluding with your opinion.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear but could benefit from more specific examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure can be improved by connecting ideas with transitional phrases to ensure the writing flows smoothly.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents an introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
You demonstrated an understanding of the task by referring to both sides of the argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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