Demand for food is increasing worldwide. What are the causes of this? What measures can be international community take to make sure the supply of food is enough?

It is true that there is a growing trend regarding food
demantion
Correct your spelling
dimension
around the world. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
myriad
Add an article
a myriad
show examples
of reasons lead
this
problem
.
However
, I believe if some steps
will be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
taken at
governmental
Correct article usage
the governmental
show examples
level,
this
problem
won't
be exist
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exist
show examples
anymore.
Firstly
, human activities play a significant role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
destroying the environment. Our
nature
is directly linked with seeds and plants which are
raw
Correct article usage
the raw
show examples
materials of our meals. We have already changed the
ecosystm
Correct your spelling
ecosystem
and climate.
Hence
, there are several plants
face
Correct pronoun usage
that face
show examples
extinction.
Secondly
, people divide
farm
areas into smaller pieces in order to build some kind of buildings
such
as flats or factories etc.
Consequently
, there are
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
farm lands
Correct your spelling
farmlands
show examples
and
also
availaible
Correct your spelling
available
areas for
farm-animals
Correct your spelling
farm animals
show examples
like cows,
Correct word choice
and sheeps
show examples
sheeps
Correct your spelling
sheep
show examples
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
authorities should adjust
laws
about destroying
nature
.
Although
there are already
plent
Correct your spelling
plenty
of
laws
related to protecting
nature
, animals etc. they should put
soild
Correct your spelling
solid
sold
laws
such
as imprisonment.
In addition
, international communities have to restrict man activities on farmlands.
Moreover
, it would be better if they
will enhance
Wrong verb form
enhanced
show examples
farm
areas and
support
Wrong verb form
supported
show examples
farmers
by
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with
show examples
weekly
Add an article
the weekly
a weekly
show examples
fee. In conclusion, it is a clear
problem
that individuals and companies impact
nature
and suitable
farm lands
Correct your spelling
farmlands
show examples
negatively.
However
, I believe if
international
Correct article usage
the international
show examples
community replace their actual
laws
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
solid
laws
,
this
problem
will be tackled.
Submitted by aslikaratepe00 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Organize the ideas more clearly in each paragraph. Try to employ clear topic sentences and logical connectors to guide the reader through the argument.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to develop and support your main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Revise some expressions and sentence structures to minimize errors and enhance clarity, such as 'there are myriad of reasons lead this problem.'
Task Achievement
You effectively highlighted the impact of human activities on the environment and agriculture, linking it to the food demand issue.
Task Achievement
Clear statement of the problem and a reasonable suggestion of governmental intervention.
Coherence and Cohesion
Good attempt at structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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